Changing Roles: Resources for Children of Aging Parents

Author

Seniors Helping Seniors - Larimer

Posted on

Sep 12, 2011

Book/Edition

Colorado - Northern Colorado

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The most difficult relationships in life have always been noted as those relationships with the ones we love the most. These loving relationships are the most complex and are continually changing over time with our parents. Whether the child or the parent, we often struggle to express our feelings or to know that we have been understood. Our needs, our desires and our feelings are so very difficult to express appropriately at any time, but particularly when our parents reach old age.
Therefore it is not a surprise that as our parents age we experience unique tensions and aggravations. The parent-child relationship is the longest lasting social ties human beings experience. Said Kira Birdett, researcher at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research. This tie is often highly positive but it also commonly includes feelings of irritation, tension and ambivalence. Birdett found it surprising that parental perceptions of tensions increased as adult children changed.
No course or book can teach one how to act or react in this ever-changing relationship. Loving and caring listening matter much more than technique. There are, however, many resources available to help us understand and deal with the changes and intergenerational differences we all know exist. A few resources are noted here.

My Mother, Your Mother by Dr. David McCullough, M.D.
Another Country by Dr Mary Pipher, PhD.
The Sandwich Generation by H. Michael Zal
Children of a Certain Age by Vivian E. Greenberg
The Caregivers Survival Handbook: How to Care for Your Aging Parent without Losing Yourself by Alexis Abramson
Aging Parents, Aging Children: How to Stay Sane and Survive by Aronson, Weiner & Kennedy
Coping in New Territory; The Handbook for Children of Aging Parents by Suzanne Roberts
Website: www.TransitionAging Parents.com
Website: Children of Aging Parents: www.caps4caregivers.org
A Bittersweet Season by Jane Gross

As difficult and trying as assisting a parent as they age can be while one is still involved in their own struggles with spouses, jobs and family, there are also many, many joys. It takes support and insight to reach that point where one can truly enjoy this period of life with our parents. Support groups are available through the Larimer County Office on Aging, the Northern Colorado Office of the Alzheimer's Association, and church groups. Ask and take advantage of these resources so that you may enjoy and celebrate the sunset of life as much as the beginning of new life.
Editors Note: This article was submitted by Linda Gabel. Linda is the owner of Seniors Helping Seniors of Northern Colorado and may be reached at 970-631-8251 or by email at shsnorthernco@gmail.com. For more information visit Seniors Helping Seniors on the web at: www.seniorshelpingseniors.com

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