Hurdles Often Stand in the Way of Communicating with Aging Parents

Author

Home Instead Senior Care

Posted on

Dec 17, 2021

Book/Edition

Florida - Sarasota, Bradenton & Charlotte Counties

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According to research conducted by the Home Instead network, two in five adult children (39%) surveyed in the U.S., and more than one-third (36%) surveyed in Canada, have at least one barrier that prevents them from having conversations with their parents about aging or end of life.
Here are a few concerns that could create problems for families. Some are from a seniors perspective, others from an adult child or family.


Living Choices

Seniors fear loss of independence, which could include giving up on certain freedoms such as driving.
Families are concerned about the cost of receiving assistance at home or moving to a care community.
Seniors are afraid they will be forced to leave their home.
Families are not aware of what their options might be.
Individuals may struggle with giving up possessions if they are down-sizing.


Financial Choices

Individuals may fear outliving their money, and don't have the understanding or resources to help take control of their situation.
Parents feel their financial situation is none of their adult children's business.
Parents don't want to be a burden.
Adult children may want to help financially but cant.


Health

Medications are expensive.
Reluctance to bother family members.
The attitude: Im old anyway, so why should it matter.
Seniors are intimidated by their doctors and don't understand them.


Relationships and Dating

Adult children worry how their parents new relationship will impact the family dynamic and issues such as inheritance.
Families worry about losing holiday traditions or their annual vacation.
Feelings of rejection: I'm no longer a priority because Mom/Dad found a replacement.
Older adults may fear being alone or lonely.
Seniors may fear losing privacy and intimate relationships when they move into a care community.


Driving

Seniors fear they wont be able to get around if they have to quit driving.
Adult children worry that seniors will hurt themselves or someone else.
Older adults could have an inaccurate perception of their ability to drive.
Adult children could feel its disrespectful to ask a parent to give up his or her keys.
Individuals don't want to bring up problems or may hide accidents for fear that they will lose driving privileges.


End of Life

People think they still have plenty of time to address end-of-life issues.
Families don't want to think about it; talking makes their mortality real.
Families don't know where to start the conversation.

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