Starting "The Conversation"

Author

Comfort Keepers

For more information about the author, click to view their website: Comfort Keepers

Posted on

Jul 19, 2023

Book/Edition

Florida - Southwest

share-this
Share This

Aging happens. There is no getting around it.

Unfortunately, conversations about preparing for our senior years often do not happen. At least not as soon as they should.

In this article, Comfort Keepers® offers suggestions for overcoming the discomfort that many times prevents adult children and parents from beginning these important discussions – whether about long-term senior care and finances, health care, end-of-life decisions, driving, or safety around the house.

The best advice is to plan carefully and think through such conversations so that they are as positive and productive as possible. Write down what you think needs to be discussed so you don’t forget anything.

Also, do not approach this important opportunity as “The Conversation”, but as an ongoing series of conversations. Address one issue at a time rather than trying to resolve everything at once. It is less intimidating that way. If you start small, you are more likely to start.

Following are additional tips for starting the discussions:

  • Begin early when your parent's health allows them to fully participate and share their wants, needs and preferences. Otherwise, your decisions may be dictated by a life-changing event and may not necessarily reflect your parent’s wishes.
  • Choose a time and place that makes everyone comfortable. Avoid special family gatherings, like a birthday or holiday celebration. Choose a time that is not hemmed in by other obligations so you can have a relaxed, unhurried conversation, giving your parent plenty of time to share his or her wishes.
  • Include other family members but meet before approaching your parent to make sure everyone’s on the same page to avoid an unproductive, confrontational situation.
  • Make the experience non-threatening by letting your parent know you’re concerned for his or her well-being and want to know how you can help them. Explain that you would like to help them write down their plans to help assure that they are followed. You also can help open the discussion about long-term planning by inquiring whether there are any responsibilities – such as home maintenance, yard work or bill paying—they would like you or someone else to help with to make life easier.
  • Use good communication skills. Maintain good eye contact and get close enough to your parent, without invading personal space. Closeness builds trust and allows you to speak – and be heard – in an even, controlled voice.
  • Share an experience such as your own retirement or estate planning as a way to gracefully transition into a conversation about your parents’ thoughts regarding the future. A friend or relative’s medical emergency could also serve as an opening for dialogue.
  • Ask about records and documents. Ask your parent where they keep important documents such as insurance policies, wills, trust documents, investment and banking records, tax returns, living wills and durable powers of attorney. Explain that you want to be prepared to help them when needed. This could also serve as a way of finding out what plans he or she have already made and what needs to be done.
  • Ask open-ended questions that encourage your parent to share feelings. Then sit back and carefully listen to learn what is important to him or her.
  • Offer options, not advice. Pose questions and offer more than one acceptable solution. Ask your parent which choice they prefer. This involves them in the decision process and enables them to exercise control and independence.
  • Speak with respect. Approach the discussion as a partner with your parent. In other words, make sure your parent is an active participant in the conversation. Stop to listen and respect their desire and need to maintain control over their lives. Avoid reversing roles in the discussion, that is, you acting as the parent and your parent as the child. This could cause your parent to resist your attempts to open discussion.
  • Keep it simple. As stated earlier, do not try to resolve everything at once. The goal is to open an ongoing, honest dialogue about your parent’s future, to share information and to understand your parent’s wishes and needs so that decisions can be made.
  • Involve third parties if your parent resists your efforts to begin the discussion. He or she may be more open to the guidance of a respected non-family member, such as a doctor, a member of the clergy, a geriatric care manager, representative of an area agency on aging or trusted friends and neighbors who may have already helped a loved one in a similar situation.

Seniors Can Initiate the Conversation, Too

If you are a senior who is looking ahead and wanting to plan for the future, you do not have to wait for your children to bring up the subject. Often adult children don’t like thinking about their parents getting older and are reluctant to initiate the discussion.

  • Take the initiative. If you begin having difficulty with activities of daily living, such as bathing, driving, or managing finances, speak with your physician or other healthcare professional. Also bring up the subject with family and ask for their suggestions and assistance.
  • Share your preferences with family and friends. Do you want to continue living at home but with the help of a caregiver who can assist with certain tasks around the house? Or if you are finding it more difficult to prepare nutritious meals for yourself, would you prefer having meals delivered or having someone prepare meals for you in your home?
  • Learn about available services to help you as you age. Physicians, social workers, geriatric care managers and other healthcare professionals can guide you in this, and your local Area Agency or Council on Aging can provide a listing of services available in your area.

Other Articles You May Like

Navigating Senior Placement in Utah: A Trusted Guide for Families

As our loved ones age, finding the right care and living arrangements becomes a pressing concern. For many Utah families, the process of senior placement can feel overwhelmingfilled with emotional decisions, logistical challenges, and a rapidly changing healthcare landscape. Whether you're seeking assisted living, memory care, or skilled nursing, understanding your options and working with trusted professionals is essential to ensuring your loved one transitions safely and comfortably into the next phase of life.What Is Senior Placement?Senior placement refers to the process of helping older adults and their families identify and transition into the most appropriate living environment based on their health, preferences, and financial situation. This could include independent living, assisted living, memory care, or long-term skilled nursing.While some families go through the search alone, many rely on senior placement professionals or advisors to guide them through the maze of options. These experts assess the seniors needs and match them with communities or services that fit their medical, social, and financial criteria.Why Senior Placement Matters in UtahUtah has a growing population of older adults, and as demand rises, so do the number of available senior housing communities and care services. From Salt Lake City to St. George, the state offers a variety of optionsbut not all of them are the right fit for every individual.What makes senior placement in Utah especially important is the regional diversity of services and costs. Urban areas may offer more choices, while rural communities might require longer waitlists or travel distances. A knowledgeable senior placement professional can help families navigate these local differences, ensuring they find a safe and supportive environment without unnecessary stress.Key Factors to Consider in the Placement ProcessWhen beginning the senior placement journey in Utah, keep these considerations in mind:Level of care needed: Is your loved one still fairly independent, or are they living with complex medical needs or dementia? Location preferences: Do they want to remain close to family, or would they prefer a quieter community in a scenic part of Utah?Financial situation: What types of housing or care services are covered by insurance, Medicaid, or personal finances?Cultural or religious values: Utahs senior living communities vary in cultural offerings and affiliationsimportant factors for many families.Benefits of Using a Senior Placement ProfessionalEven if you have time to tour communities yourself, a senior placement specialist can save you time, money, and emotional energy. These professionals offer:In-depth knowledge of Utahs senior housing marketPersonalized recommendations based on care needsHelp coordinating tours and assessmentsInsight into availability, costs, and quality ratingsSupport with application and move-in logisticsBecause Seniors Blue Book is a neutral and trusted resource, we recommend that families educate themselves using local directories and free listings before making any decisions. A great place to begin is with our Utah Senior Resources Directory where you can browse services and support tailored to your region.You can also explore specific senior placement service providers in Utah here: Utah Senior Placement ServicesSupporting Informed, Compassionate DecisionsChoosing a senior care community or service is one of the most important decisions a family can make. With the right resources and local guidance, the senior placement process doesnt have to be overwhelming. Utah families can take comfort in knowing that they have access to a variety of support tools and professionals ready to help every step of the way. If youre beginning the journey or helping a loved one transition, start with trusted resources like SeniorsBlueBook.com to explore your options with confidence.

Navigating Senior Placement in Southwest Florida: A Guide for Families and Caregivers

Helping You Find the Right Senior Living SolutionFinding the right senior living arrangement can be overwhelmingespecially when time, emotions, and complex care needs are involved. Thats where Senior Placement services come in. These professionals help families in Southwest Florida navigate the options available for senior housing and care, ensuring a more personalized and informed decision-making process.In this blog, well explore what senior placement means, why it matters, and how you can leverage local resources in Southwest Florida to support a smooth transition for your loved one. What Is Senior Placement?Senior placement refers to the process of assisting older adults and their families in finding appropriate senior living or care arrangements. Placement specialists evaluate an individuals medical, emotional, financial, and lifestyle needs to recommend suitable housing options such as:Independent living communitiesAssisted living facilitiesMemory care residencesSkilled nursing centersResidential care homesThe ultimate goal is to match the individual with a community or care setting that meets their unique circumstances and supports long-term well-being. Why Senior Placement Services Matter in Southwest FloridaSouthwest Florida is one of the top destinations for retirees, known for its sunny climate, high quality of life, and range of senior living options. But with so many choices available, it can be hard to know where to begin.Senior placement professionals in this region offer valuable insights, including:In-depth knowledge of local communities and care providersAssistance understanding costs and payment optionsPersonalized recommendations based on care needsGuidance through tours, applications, and transitionsEmotional support for families during difficult decisionsFor families juggling caregiving responsibilities and lifes other demands, these services offer much-needed clarity and peace of mind. How Does the Senior Placement Process Work?While every placement service varies slightly, most follow a similar structure: Initial Consultation A placement advisor learns about your loved ones health conditions, care preferences, and budget. Assessment and Matching Based on the evaluation, a shortlist of communities or providers is developed. Community Tours Families are guided through tours of the most suitable options. Support with Transition Advisors may assist with paperwork, moving logistics, and ongoing support after placement. Its important to note that many senior placement services are offered at no cost to the family. Instead, these professionals are often compensated by the communities they partner with, though neutral directories like Seniors Blue Book help ensure transparency and choice. Choosing the Right Senior Placement Support in Southwest FloridaAs with any important decision, its critical to work with professionals who are experienced, compassionate, and unbiased. While some services work with only a few communities, others offer a broader range of options.When considering a senior placement specialist, ask:Are they familiar with communities across Southwest Florida?How do they determine which communities are a good fit?Do they consider both medical and social needs in their recommendations?Do they provide support beyond the initial placement?You can begin your search and find helpful tools through the Seniors Blue Books trusted local directory: Browse Senior Resources in Southwest Florida Explore Senior Placement Services Near You The Benefits of Local ExpertiseSenior placement professionals with experience in Southwest Florida bring deep knowledge of the areas resources, licensing standards, and unique living environments. They can provide guidance on everything from hurricane safety plans in senior communities to proximity to hospitals and family members.Final Thoughts: Empowering Better DecisionsNavigating senior living options doesnt have to be stressful. With the right guidance, families can find safe, supportive, and engaging environments that honor their loved ones dignity and preferences. If youre exploring senior placement in Southwest Florida, take the first step by browsing trusted, local resources and directories that can help simplify your searchwithout pressure or bias.

Navigating Senior Placement in Southern Colorado: A Local Guide for Families and Caregivers

Finding the right care setting for an aging loved one can be an emotional and overwhelming process. From understanding different care options to coordinating financial logistics and touring communities, its a lot to manageespecially when time is limited or the situation is urgent.Thats where senior placement services come in. In Southern Colorado, these services play a vital role in guiding families through the transition to senior living. Whether youre seeking assisted living, memory care, or independent living, knowing how to navigate senior placement can make all the difference. What Is Senior Placement?Senior placement refers to the process of helping older adults and their families find the right senior living community based on their individual care needs, preferences, lifestyle, and budget. Its not a one-size-fits-all approachinstead, its personalized guidance designed to ease the burden of decision-making and ensure a smooth transition.Senior placement professionals offer:In-depth needs assessmentsRecommendations for local communitiesCoordination of tours and interviewsSupport with paperwork and move-in planningGuidance on financial and long-term care optionsThese services are especially valuable during stressful times, such as hospital discharges or sudden health changes. Why Senior Placement Matters in Southern ColoradoSouthern Colorado is home to a growing senior population and a wide variety of senior living communities. From Pueblo to Canon City to the San Luis Valley, families in the region are increasingly seeking trusted, local resources to help them make informed care decisions.Heres why senior placement is particularly important in this region:1. Access to Local ExpertiseSenior placement professionals in Southern Colorado often have close relationships with local care communities and understand the unique services each one offers. This insider knowledge helps families avoid wasting time and ensures that their loved ones needs are matched with the right community.2. Navigating Rural and Urban OptionsSouthern Colorado includes both more rural areas and small cities. Senior placement services help families weigh the pros and cons of location, transportation access, and community amenities in different settings.3. Support for Out-of-Area FamiliesIf youre helping a loved one transition from afar, local placement services can act as your eyes and ears on the groundproviding honest assessments, virtual tours, and consistent communication throughout the process. Common Reasons Families Seek Senior Placement SupportA loved one can no longer live safely at home aloneA recent hospital stay requires a step-down care solutionDementia or chronic illness is progressingCaregivers are experiencing burnoutA move is needed, but the options feel overwhelmingWhether planned or unexpected, a placement advisor can provide peace of mind and practical help when its most needed. How to Start the Senior Placement Process in Southern ColoradoIf you're considering senior placement services in Southern Colorado, heres how to begin: Assess Your Needs Identify the type of care your loved one needsindependent living, assisted living, memory care, or skilled nursing. Browse Local Resources Explore the full directory of senior resources in the region: Southern Colorado Senior Resources Directory Connect with Local Advisors Search for trusted, neutral senior placement professionals who can help guide your next steps: Southern Colorado Senior Placement Listings Schedule Consultations and Tours Most senior placement services will help set up tours and even accompany you if needed. Be sure to visit more than one community to compare options.  Final Thoughts: Making Informed, Compassionate DecisionsChoosing a senior living community is one of the most important decisions a family can make. With the support of local senior placement experts in Southern Colorado, families can feel confident in their choices, reduce stress, and ensure their loved one finds a place where they can thrive. At Seniors Blue Book, were committed to providing neutral, informative, and comprehensive resources to help families navigate senior care options with clarity and confidence.

Local Services By This Author

Comfort Keepers of SW Florida

Home Health 12480 Brantley Commons Ct., Fort Myers, Florida, 33907

Comfort Keepers is a leading provider of in-home senior care services for elderly loved ones living in Fort Myers, Florida, and surrounding Southwest FL areas. Located at 12480 Brantley Commons Ct #101, Ft. Myers, Florida 33907, Comfort Keepers is dedicated to elevating the human spirit by providing quality care, comfort, and companionship to seniors in their own homes.Our mission is to help seniors remain independent by providing reliable care tailored to their needs. Our experienced professionals offer a range of services, including companionship, personal care assistance, and safety care, ensuring that seniors receive the support they need to live comfortably and safely at home.At Comfort Keepers, we understand the importance of maintaining independence and quality of life as we age. That's why we offer flexible care plans and personalized care options to meet the unique needs of each senior. Our caregivers are trained to provide specialized care for seniors with Alzheimer's and dementia, ensuring they receive the highest level of support and comfort.We also provide transportation services, technology support, and 24-hour care for seniors who need consistent monitoring. Our goal is to provide peace of mind to families, knowing their loved ones are receiving the care and companionship they deserve.If you're interested in becoming a caregiver, Comfort Keepers offers rewarding job opportunities with competitive pay and flexible scheduling. Join our team and help us make a difference in the lives of seniors in our community.For more information about our services or career opportunities, please contact us at (239) 590-8999 or visit our website.

Comfort Keepers of SW Florida

Non-Medical 12480 Brantley Commons Court, Fort Myers, Florida, 33907

Comfort Keepers is a leading provider of in-home senior care services for elderly loved ones living in Fort Myers, Florida, and surrounding Southwest FL areas. Located at 12480 Brantley Commons Ct #101, Ft. Myers, Florida 33907, Comfort Keepers is dedicated to elevating the human spirit by providing quality care, comfort, and companionship to seniors in their own homes.Our mission is to help seniors remain independent by providing reliable care tailored to their needs. Our experienced professionals offer a range of services, including companionship, personal care assistance, and safety care, ensuring that seniors receive the support they need to live comfortably and safely at home.At Comfort Keepers, we understand the importance of maintaining independence and quality of life as we age. That's why we offer flexible care plans and personalized care options to meet the unique needs of each senior. Our caregivers are trained to provide specialized care for seniors with Alzheimer's and dementia, ensuring they receive the highest level of support and comfort.We also provide transportation services, technology support, and 24-hour care for seniors who need consistent monitoring. Our goal is to provide peace of mind to families, knowing their loved ones are receiving the care and companionship they deserve.If you're interested in becoming a caregiver, Comfort Keepers offers rewarding job opportunities with competitive pay and flexible scheduling. Join our team and help us make a difference in the lives of seniors in our community.For more information about our services or career opportunities, please contact us at (239) 590-8999 or visit our website.

Comfort Keepers

Non-Medical , Port Charlotte, Florida, 33948

Families choose Comfort Keepers for different reasons. For some, it is for extensive care. For others, we offer a much needed break for family members who regularly provide care. Each Comfort Keepers client has unique care needs. That is why we offer a full range of in-home services - to tailor care plans that provide our senior and other adult clients the right amount and types of help to support independent living at home. These senior home care services are provided by the special caregivers we call Comfort Keepers, to promote independent living to its fullest. Comfort Keepers touches lives around the world and is the comforting solution for your loved one's in-home care.