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The National Alliance for Caregiving and the AARP estimate that more than 53 million Americans are family caregivers: People of all ages who provide care, support, and assistance for a loved one. This number is almost certainly a low estimate and is sure to increase as more Baby Boomers age and require help to achieve their health, wellness, and everyday living goals.
Family caregivers do an incredible amount of work to ensure that aging loved ones are safe, secure, and healthy. But what does taking care of an aging loved one in your home really look like? If you’re new to the role of family caregiver, it’s important to understand the realities of caregiving and know when to consider senior living for the benefit of yourself and your loved one.
While not all older adults will need all of these forms of assistance, it’s important to plan ahead for changing needs. Don’t forget to consider your own health and well-being in this equation, too—be honest and compassionate toward yourself as you determine whether you can be an effective caregiver or if you need to consider senior living options.
Older adults face mobility challenges for numerous reasons. As people age, their muscle strength can decrease by as much as 50%. Combined with the natural deterioration of neurons that help with motor functions, this loss of muscle can make it hard for older people to drive, walk, use stairs, and more.
Remaining as mobile as possible is critical for people’s overall health, well-being, and sense of confidence, which means caregivers may need to help elders:
Did you know that our nutrition needs change as we get older? A healthy diet is important at all stages of life, but for people over 55, getting the right balance of calories, nutrients, and vitamins can help prevent and manage chronic conditions, support muscle health and mobility, and much more.
Of course, older adults face unique barriers to getting the nutrients they need. Diminished taste and smell senses can make food seem less appealing, and conditions like dementia can make chewing and swallowing difficult. Caregivers are a crucial part of supporting nutritional needs and may need to:
Housekeeping is never easy, but it can be particularly challenging for older adults. If you’re a family caregiver, you may be called upon to help your loved one with anything from laundry to lawn care.
When considering your ability to provide care for a loved one, make sure to factor in household help, such as:
Personal hygiene is one of the most emotionally charged caregiving tasks. Sometimes, older adults feel embarrassed or ashamed when a family member has to help them with things like bathing, dressing, grooming, and especially toileting. Without the right approach, these interactions can be particularly taxing to both parties.
Maintaining a person’s dignity while helping them with personal care tasks should be a top priority. Personal care tasks may include helping a person:
If your loved one requires skilled nursing care, it’s always best to have a professionally trained caregiver administer it. Still, family caregivers may need to help their loved ones organize their medications and communicate with their doctor to ensure that everyone fully understands their care plan.
If you are going to be a family caregiver, you may be an integral part of helping your loved one navigate the healthcare landscape, from attending doctor’s visits with them to encouraging healthy behaviors at home like exercise. This extends to their mental health as well, making sure that they have everything they need to stay connected to a social network, participate in activities that bring them joy, and remain engaged with life’s meaningful moments.
The choice of whether to take care of an aging loved one at home or consider senior living is difficult. If you are newly taking on the role of family caregiver, or if you’ve been handling this responsibility for a while and are feeling burned out, being realistic about your own abilities—and your loved one’s care needs—is critical.
Depending on the level of assistance they need, caring for an older person can be a full-time job. And if you’re stretched too thin—emotionally, physically, or financially—you won’t be able to provide the best possible care. While it may be hard to think about at first, in many cases, senior living communities are the best option for everyone involved.
Take some time to think about your situation as critically as you can.
If you have been providing unpaid care for a loved one or are preparing to take on this role, you may benefit from additional support. Senior living options can provide that support, and CarePatrol is here to help you find the perfect community.
We are a network of local senior care experts offering hands-on, concierge-style assistance to help you find the perfect assisted living, independent living, or memory care community for your loved one’s needs and your family’s budget. Best of all, we offer our services at no cost to you!
In health care settings, the body gets medical attention, but the mind and soul matter, too. Older adults in medical care face a battery of health questions, but too often the most consequential one goes unasked and unanswered: What does a good day look like for you today?Medicare requires people to receive a spiritual assessment within their first five days of admission into hospice. Many states allow a nurse to conduct the initial spiritual assessment, but I think it helps both the person and the health care provider for the assessment to be done with someone who has theological training. Many have been certified in clinical pastoral education, or CPE. Nurses can get so focused on the technical to-do lists of medical work the measurements, the tests, the drug regimens that it can be hard to make time for the issues that matter most to the living human, namely, their happiness, peace and contentment. As a spiritual care provider with 17 years in senior care facilities, and as a chaplain in the Army National Guard and Air Force National Guard, I have counseled hundreds of people in the final days of their lives. For older adults and their families, one of the most valuable resources is also little-known a Medicare option that provides spiritual counseling for people in hospice. Longing for ConversationToo often older adults in care are being talked at, not listened to. Many times, I've found that people in the last chapter of life want to discuss their path to the end more than their medical professionals and, especially, more than their loved ones. It often helps to have that discussion with a professional who is trained to hear them, and, if requested, to comfort and advise them. RecommendedOpinion: Why I Went on Hospice Even Though I'm Not Dying | Personal PerspectivesThe code of ethics for the leading chaplain and spiritual care associations all prohibit proselytizing. A spiritual care provider should be able to work with someone on their own terms, no matter their beliefs. The United States may be turning more secular, but the fact remains that older adults are the most faith-affiliated of any demographic age group.This initial spiritual meeting is likely to be about the basics: Is the person religious? What is their support system? Will a certain faith-based ritual bring meaning or comfort? Do they have a preferred faith leader? Or is a secular discussion a better fit for the person's beliefs?
Guardianship is a serious legal process that serves as a last resort for caring for an elderly parent who can no longer make sound decisions for themselves. It requires a court hearing and confirmation of incapacity by medical providers.What is Guardianship?Guardianship means an individual is appointed by the court to make medical decisions and manage daily care for an elderly parent. This typically occurs when an elderly parent:Is diagnosed with cognitive impairments like dementia or Alzheimer's diseaseHas suffered brain injuriesExperiences serious health conditions that impair decision-making abilitiesKey Considerations in GuardianshipEmotional ChallengesDeciding to pursue guardianship often involves mixed emotions. Adult children may feel uncomfortable, especially if family members disagree about the necessity of guardianship.Legal RequirementsTo establish guardianship, documentation must be submitted to the court that:Substantiates the degree of cognitive impairmentProvides evidence of poor decision-makingIncludes a medical assessment, potentially a neuropsychological evaluationTypes of GuardianshipGuardian ResponsibilitiesMake medical decisionsManage daily careAdvocate for the elderly parent's best interestsFollow the principle of substituted judgment (making decisions the parent would make)ConservatorshipIn most situations, a conservator is also appointed to manage money and property. This can be the same person as the guardian or a separate individual.Challenges of GuardianshipAdvocacy and Medical InteractionsGuardians must:Navigate complex healthcare systemsCommunicate with medical professionalsUnderstand and research medical conditionsMake thorough, prudent decisionsFamily DynamicsGuardianship can create:Potential conflicts between family membersDisagreements about care and spendingEmotional stress that may damage relationshipsState-Specific ConsiderationsGuardianship laws and terminology vary by state. Some states have:Different definitions of guardianshipVarying availability of professional guardiansUnique legal frameworks for elder careImportance of PreparationRecommended StepsHave early discussions about care preferencesDocument the elderly parent's wishesUnderstand the full scope of guardianship responsibilitiesSeek support and resources for caregiversAs the population ages and chronic diseases become more prevalent, understanding guardianship becomes increasingly important for families caring for elderly parents.
Check In on Your Loved One During the Holidays The holiday season is a time for family gatherings, traditions, and reconnecting with loved ones. Its a wonderful opportunity to catch up and celebrate, but its also the perfect chance to check in on elderly parents or relatives to ensure theyre doing well. Sometimes, these visits can provide insight into their health, well-being, and overall quality of life that you might not see from a distance.Here are some signs to look for during your visit: Changes in personal hygiene: Noticeable neglect of bathing, grooming, wearing clean clothes, or maintaining trimmed nails. Pay attention to mobility issues, recent falls, or unexplained bruising. Medication management: Look for missed doses, expired prescriptions, or general confusion about their medication routine. These are all signs they might need help managing their health. Living space upkeep: Take note of unkempt homes with piled laundry, misplaced items, spoiled food, or clutter that could pose a fall risk, like throw rugs or poorly placed cords. Emotional or cognitive changes: Watch for signs of depression, forgetfulness, confusion, loneliness, or isolation. These shifts can indicate underlying health issues. Financial management struggles: Keep an eye out for stacks of unopened mail, unpaid bills, or disorganized storage of important documents. Difficulty handling finances is a common red flag. Driving concerns: If theyre still driving, check their car for signs of accidents, such as scrapes or dents.What to Do if You Notice Changes If you spot signs of decline, here are steps you can take to address your concerns:1. Take notes: Write down your observations. Keeping a detailed list of your concerns will help when speaking with your loved one or their healthcare provider. 2. Start the conversation: Share your observations in a compassionate and nonjudgmental way. Use this as an opportunity to discuss their needs and explore support options, such as assistance with daily activities, companionship, or meal services. 3. Consult their doctor: Reach out to their primary care provider to share your concerns and learn about any recommendations. The doctor may already have insights into their health or suggest scheduling a physical or needs assessment. 4. Explore senior living options: If additional support seems necessary, consider visiting senior living communities to understand the available levels of care, such as independent living, assisted living, or memory care. Touring a community can help determine if its the right fit for your loved one.Tips for Having the Conversation Discussing a loved ones needs can be delicate. Here are some tips to make the conversation more effective and compassionate: Pick the right time: Choose a quiet, private moment to bring up your concerns. Avoid discussing sensitive topics during large family gatherings or high-stress situations. Be empathetic: Acknowledge their feelings and emphasize that you want to support them in maintaining their independence and quality of life. Involve them in decisions: Wherever possible, let them take an active role in deciding how to address their needs. This helps them feel respected and in control. Focus on solutions: Frame your concerns around finding practical ways to help, rather than simply pointing out problems.Why the Holidays Are a Perfect Time to Check In The holidays offer a rare opportunity to see your loved ones in person and observe any changes in their behavior, health, or environment. With everyone gathered together, its also easier to have collaborative conversations with other family members about how best to support them.By being proactive during your holiday visit, you can help ensure your loved one gets the care and support they need to stay happy and healthy. Whether that means arranging for extra assistance at home or exploring senior living options, taking action now can make a meaningful difference in their quality of life.
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