The Dementia Diagnosis

Posted on

Nov 18, 2020

Hearing a loved one receive a dementia diagnosis is among the hardest news a person could hear. My grandmas diagnosis left a defining impact on my family. Fortunately,adequate preparation can lead to less stress on you and a better quality of life for your loved one. At Oasis Senior Advisors, we love to help families solve these problems before they happen.
First, understand that some cognitive decline is completely normal. Signs of normal cognitive decline include:

More thinking time
Multitasking becomes more difficult
Some new information, like technology, can be difficult to learn
Common, everyday tasks take longer

If youre worried your loved one may be suffering from dementia, see a physician. We encourage our families to see a neurologist or other clinic that specializes in dementia.
If your loved one receives a diagnosis, get your team of support ready. Your children, close friends, and extended family need to be made aware of the diagnosis, and you, the family, need support! Some people are keenly aware and understand their diagnosis, while others cannot grasp what is happening and may be certain nothing is wrong. Your loved one may even blame you. Do not take this personally; its frequently outside of your control.
As a family member or caregiver, it can be frustrating when your loved one can no longer understand you. If they dont understand, they no longer can, so please dont expect them to. It robs them of their dignity, causes frustration, and accomplishes nothing. They cannot change, so we must. Join them in their reality. If they believe theyre in a different time and place, as is common, join them there.
There are many ways to care for a loved one. If you care for your loved one for a period of time, deep into disease, or not at all, you are wonderful! Admitting that caregiving is not for you may actually be the best way for you to care for him or her. Assisted Living, Memory Care, and Home Care are all valid and correct options. Were here to help, regardless of what your correct decision may be.
Editors Note: Written by Steven Moses, CSA CDP CPRS, with Oasis Senior Advisors of Orlando. He can be reached at 407 250 8100 or visit www.OasisSeniorAdvisors.com/Orlando

Other Articles You May Like

Caregiver Guide: Dos and Donts for Engaging Loved Ones with Cognitive Decline

Caring for an older adult with cognitive difficulties, such as dementia or Alzheimers disease, requires patience, empathy, and a thoughtful approach to daily activities. As our loved ones with dementia might have communication challenges, we become more attuned to observing body language and facial expressions. The right activities can provide a sense of purpose, stimulate memory, and improve overall well-being. However, choosing the wrong activities can lead to frustration or confusion. This guide offers practical advice on the dos and donts of engaging loved ones with cognitive decline.Do:        Simplify tasks and break them down into smaller steps.For example, if your loved one enjoyed cooking, involve them in simple tasks like stirring ingredients or setting the table. This allows them to participate without feeling overwhelmed by the complexity of the activity.Familiar rote tasks can provide a sense of purpose and success i.e.: folding towels or setting the table.Dont:        Set up for failureAvoid setting high expectations for perfection or completion of tasks. The goal is engagement, not mastery. If your loved one loses interest or struggles with a task, its okay to move on to something else without pressure. Try active listening techniques.Do:        Promote social interactionEngage in activities that foster social interaction, like looking through old photo albums, reminiscing about the past, or participating in small group activities. Social engagement is crucial for older adults as it helps combat feelings of isolation and keeps their minds active. Offer prompting open-ended questions to encourage engagement. Consider looking for a local Adult Day Center near you that might offer activities and social interaction.Dont:        Overwhelm with large gatheringsAvoid large social gatherings or unfamiliar environments that could cause sensory overload or anxiety. Instead, keep interactions small and personal, with familiar faces and settings to provide a sense of security and comfort.Do:        Watch television: many of us utilize television for entertainment but it can often become the primary source of structure and activity for the day.Watching cooking shows can be good if you are looking to improve appetite but can also cause overeating.Watching nature programs with positive content is engaging, however cycle-of-life or aggressive programming (like natural disasters) can produce anxiety. Baby animal shows can be a particular favorite as there is no plot to follow.Watching beloved shows can be nostalgic and comforting, and comedy skit shows also have no plot to follow.Consider what types of programs are watched at different times of day something with no speaking and just photography is good for resting, and sports might spark a desire for more activity.Dont:        Allow TV to cause anxiety or be a substitute for activity or personal interactionWatching the news can be distressing for some and cause anxietyConfrontational talk show formats can be confusing and angry participants may display unwanted behaviors.Sitting in front of the TV all day isnt good for anyone, and this is not engaging in socialization or cognitive stimulation.Do:        Incorporate music and artUse music and art as therapeutic tools. Older adults with cognitive difficulties often respond well to music from their youth or simple art activities like coloring or painting. These activities can stimulate the senses and provide a creative outlet, even for those with advanced cognitive impairment.Dont:        Use Activities that require complex decision-makingAvoid activities that require complex decision-making or too many choices. This can be overwhelming and may lead to frustration. Instead, offer simple, clear options that allow for easy participation. Offer a choice between two things such as menu items or daily clothing choices.Do:        Accept help when caregiving becomes overwhelming.Consider hiring an Aging Life Care Manager.  An Aging Life Care Manager can provide expert guidance, help coordinate care, and offer support in making decisions for your loved one.  Dont:        Set your expectations too high or schedule too full.Try to go with the flow and understand things might not go exactly as planned and thats okay. Schedule in extra time for activities or to get to appointments. If you feel frustrated, step away, regain composure (your loved one if not being difficult on purpose) and try again with a new energy. Read tips on how to deal with caregiver stress.As you consider what activity choices to offer your loved one, consider variety and time of day. Include exercise and socialization, as well as hygiene and rest. Modify, modify, modify. If they seem overwhelmed with an activity, try simplifying to a point they can successfully engage. For example: a puzzle with fewer and larger pieces, simple matching games, and activities to stimulate fine motor skills. Remember not to infantilize your loved one, but rather adjust to their needs. Be mindful of your loved ones response to an activity and be flexible with both them and yourself.

How to Talk to a Parent with Dementia

Understanding how to talk to a parent with dementia is an ongoing education, especially when it comes to a progressive disease like Alzheimers. As patients move through the different stages, they may become disoriented, confused or have trouble reasoning in addition to experiencing memory problems. Sometimes, expressing emotion or talking about what they are going through can be equally upsetting. Learning what to look out for and how to communicate with a dementia patient is crucial with cognitive disorders. Keep an eye out of these 3 early signs of dementia, and read on to discover how best to talk to someone suffering from the disease. Tips for Talking to Those Living with Dementia Offer Patience and Reassurance Patience is absolutely key when it comes to dealing with someone who has Alzheimers. As you learn the types of things that can cause confusion, anger or fear, be sure to reassure your loved one that everything is alright and that they are safe. If they take a moment to respond, give them that space and patience to ensure they are able to express themselves without added pressure. Dont Criticize or Argue Although the effects of dementia on caregivers can be vast, creating hard-to-handle stress and burdens, one thing to remember is that criticizing or arguing will only make things worse. As your loved ones brain is affected by this disease, they may not be thinking rationally during your conversations. In their Encourage Other Forms of Communication While Alzheimers and dementia wont impact your loved ones ability to speak in most cases, that doesnt mean that it will be the easiest way to communicate. Other forms of communication may give them time to think about what they are trying to say and help them from becoming agitated as they try to speak. Whether its writing things down, pointing, gesturing or even relying on visuals, these nonverbal skills can be very important when learning how to talk to a parent with dementia. Avoid Vague Statements or Too Many Questions Be clear in what you want or need when talking to someone with dementia. Vague statements only add to the confusion they may already be experiencing. For example, instead of saying, Lets go, explain to them where you are going and why. In that same vein, avoid asking too many questions as could be overwhelming. If possible, turn your questions into leading statements to direct their responses in a healthy way. Opt for the Positive Over the Negative Theres no doubt that there will be things to discuss with aging parents. But, whether youre working your way through hard conversations or simply telling your loved one its time for dinner, make sure that your messages are filled with positivity. These positive statements can make all the difference in the world, helping to keep agitated or angry behaviors at bay in favor of a good mood all around for you and your loved one. Keep Calm and Carry On Living with dementia is not easy, whether youre the patient or the caregiver. Patience is key, so remember to keep your wits about you and your temper under control. Remaining calm will help you deal with anything that comes up as you learn the best ways to talk to someone experiencing dementia. Whether the conversation goes well or not, its important to remember that you will have good days and bad. Dont give up hope and keep focused on learning better ways to communicate with your loved one. How Dementia Care Can Help When it comes to Alzheimers and other cognitive disorders, it is often hard to know which steps to take. If your loved one is exhibiting signs that the disease is progressing, let FirstLights knowledgeable experts help we are well-versed in how to talk to a parent with dementia. We offer individualized, in-home dementia care services in a number of cities that can provide much-needed peace of mind. Turn to FirstLight Home Care, a brand that will be by your side every step of the way. To get started on your journey, inquire about a personalized quote or reach out today to talk with your local FirstLight team at 612-473-3227.  

Navigating Conversations about Memory Loss with Compassion and Care

Memory loss is a sensitive topic that can be challenging to address, especially with someone you care deeply about. Whether its a parent, a friend, or a partner showing signs of forgetfulness, knowing how to talk about it is crucial. In this blog, well explore strategies for approaching these delicate conversations with empathy and understanding. Youll find practical tips to guide you, making the discussion more comfortable for both you and your loved one.Understanding Memory LossMemory loss isnt just about forgetting where you put your keys. It can range from minor forgetfulness to more serious issues, such as Alzheimers disease. Recognizing the signs is the first step in addressing the concern. Noticeable changes might include repeating questions, misplacing items frequently, or struggling to follow conversations. Understanding these symptoms can help you approach the situation more knowledgeably.Open conversations about memory loss are crucial because they can lead to early diagnosis and treatment. Ignoring these signs can result in further deterioration and missed opportunities for support. By discussing memory concerns early, you provide a foundation for exploring medical advice and therapeutic interventions that might mitigate the impact.Memory loss affects millions worldwide, with approximately 47 million people living with dementia globally. The numbers highlight the importance of discussing memory concerns openly. The earlier these talks happen, the better chance your loved one has of maintaining their quality of life.Preparing for the ConversationBefore you initiate a conversation about memory loss, preparation is key. Decide what you aim to achieve from the conversation. Is it to express concern, gather information, or suggest seeking professional help? Having a clear purpose will guide the discussion and help maintain focus. It also ensures you approach the topic with sensitivity, focusing on their well-being rather than your fears.Reflect on the specific incidents or behaviors that have raised your concern. Being able to reference specific events or examples can help to make the conversation more productive.Choosing the right time and place is also essential. A calm, quiet environment where your loved one feels comfortable is ideal. Avoid crowded or noisy locations that could cause distractions or stress. Consider their mood and schedule the discussion when theyre likely to be relaxed and receptive.Starting the Conversation with EmpathyEmpathy is your ally when discussing memory loss. Begin with gentle, caring language that prioritizes their feelings and comfort. Use I statements, such as Ive noticed you seem to be more forgetful lately, and Im concerned because I care about you. This approach minimizes defensiveness and opens the door to a supportive dialogue.Showing genuine concern involves active listening. Allow them to express their feelings, fears, and frustrations without interruption. Validate their emotions by acknowledging their experiences and offering reassurance. This builds trust and demonstrates that youre there to support them through this challenging time.Its important to strike a balance between empathy and honesty. While you want to be gentle, you also need to be clear about your observations. Share specific examples that highlight your concerns, like remembering names or recalling recent events. While they may have trouble remembering these events, this can help provide context for the discussion and emphasizes the importance of addressing memory issues.Addressing Their Fears and ConcernsMemory loss can be frightening, and your loved one may have fears about the future. Its vital to provide reassurance and support during this time. Reassure them that theyre not alone and that youre there to face these challenges together.Encourage them to share their worries, whether its about losing independence or being a burden to others. Listening to their concerns without judgment shows that youre there to support them unconditionally. Acknowledge the validity of their fears and offer your presence as a source of strength.Discussing memory loss can be overwhelming, so its helpful to break the conversation into manageable parts. Address one concern at a time, allowing them to process information and respond thoughtfully. This approach prevents them from feeling overwhelmed and keeps the dialogue productive and focused.Encouraging Professional EvaluationSuggesting a professional evaluation can be a delicate subject. Approach it as a way to seek guidance rather than a diagnosis. Frame it as an opportunity to learn more about their memory and explore potential solutions together. This perspective makes the idea of seeing a doctor less intimidating.Explain the benefits of early diagnosis, such as access to treatments, therapies, and support networks. Highlight that a professional evaluation can provide valuable insights into their cognitive health and offer peace of mind. Assure them that seeking help is a proactive step toward understanding and managing memory concerns.Offer to accompany them to medical appointments and help with necessary arrangements. Your presence provides emotional support and demonstrates your commitment to their well-being. It also ensures that theyre not navigating this process alone.Providing Ongoing SupportTalking about memory loss is just the beginning. Ongoing support is crucial as your loved one navigates their memory concerns. Be there to listen, offer encouragement, and celebrate their strengths and accomplishments.Encourage them to engage in cognitive activities that promote mental health, such as puzzles, reading, or memory games. Physical exercise and a balanced diet also contribute to overall well-being. Suggest activities you can enjoy together, making it a shared experience that strengthens your bond.Establish a routine for regular check-ins, where you can discuss their progress and any new concerns. These conversations reinforce your commitment to supporting them and provide an opportunity to address any evolving needs.Involving Other Family MembersMemory loss affects not only the individual but also their family and friends. Consider involving other family members in the conversation to create a network of support. Having a collaborative approach ensures that everyone is on the same page and can contribute to decision-making. It also lightens the emotional burden on any single person by distributing responsibilities among family members.Family meetings provide an opportunity to discuss concerns, set goals, and coordinate care. Encourage open dialogue and respect each persons perspective. By working together, you can provide a more comprehensive support system for your loved one.Exploring Available ResourcesMany resources are available to support those dealing with memory loss and their families. Research local organizations, support groups, and online communities that offer information, guidance, and companionship.Encourage your loved one to connect with others facing similar challenges. Hearing stories and advice from peers can provide comfort and reduce feelings of isolation. Community resources often offer educational workshops, counseling, and social activities that enhance quality of life.Share relevant resources with your loved one and offer to explore them together. This collaborative approach makes the process less daunting and empowers them to take an active role in their care.Celebrating the PresentWhile memory loss presents challenges, its essential to celebrate the present and cherish the moments you share with your loved one. Focus on creating positive experiences and building lasting memories together.Engage in activities that bring joy, whether its a favorite hobby, a leisurely walk, or a shared meal. These experiences foster connection and remind both of you of the meaningful relationship you share.Celebrate small victories and milestones along their memory loss journey. Recognize their resilience, courage, and achievements. These celebrations reinforce positivity and provide motivation for the future.Maintaining Patience and UnderstandingMemory loss is a gradual process that requires patience and understanding. Situations may arise where your loved one struggles to remember details or becomes frustrated with their limitations. Approach these moments with compassion and offer gentle reminders when necessary.Understand that their emotions may fluctuate, and they may experience feelings of sadness, anger, or confusion. Be there to listen and offer a reassuring presence without trying to fix everything immediately.Remember that building trust and maintaining a strong relationship takes time. Your consistent support and understanding will make a significant difference in their experience and well-being.The Journey AheadDiscussing memory loss with a loved one is a complex and sensitive task. By approaching the conversation with empathy, patience, and support, you can help them feel understood and valued. Your commitment to their well-being will make a positive impact on their memory loss journey.Remember that youre not alone in this process. Reach out to professionals, support groups, and online communities for guidance and companionship. Together, you can create a supportive network that empowers your loved one to face memory challenges with confidence.By fostering open communication and providing ongoing support, you can help your loved one live a dignified and fulfilling life, despite memory concerns.Addressing memory loss with a loved one requires a thoughtful approach that balances empathy and honesty. By preparing for the conversation, providing ongoing support, and involving family members, you create a supportive environment that empowers your loved one to face memory challenges with confidence. Remember to celebrate the present, maintain patience, and explore available resources. Your dedication and care will make a meaningful difference in their memory loss journey. If youre seeking further information or resources, check out our list of Reputable Resources.  For more information contact us at 651-702-4663.