Who Are You to Speak
Lely Palms Retirement Community
For more information about the author, click to view their website: Lely Palms
Jul 21, 2023
Florida - Southwest
Email US
Click to Email Us
One of the most difficult aspects of being a caregiver for someone living with dementia has nothing to do with their actual daily care.
The challenge involves acting as a loved one’s advocate, speaking up for their needs when they can no longer formulate what is best for themselves. This situation is most difficult when physical challenges arise, such as the need for surgery or rehabilitation.
These situations also occur daily. There were times I wanted to act as my mother’s bodyguard, her protector, to the outside world. It was my job, in a way, to speak the unspoken. To say the unarticulated. I couldn’t be there all the time. There had to be other ways.
Being Named “Caregiver”
When my first husband was scheduled to receive a bone marrow transplant, I was assigned the duty and title of caregiver. I had already been his unofficial one, but agreement to this designation was required for entrance to the program. I felt important. He and I were now on equal footing. I had as much to say as he did in this quest.
Not everyone has the flexibility to be a caregiver, to be the point person, at those important junctions. However, there are certain approaches one can take or learn from, to become the advocate when necessary.
Before someone enters a hospital care setting, it’s important to establish a line of communication and a routine amongst yourself and your loved one. Just as one might do when pregnant, always carry a bag of essentials. This might include copies of living wills, snacks for your loved one (my mother loved Sandies cookies), a notebook, lavender lotion, a book for yourself or a volume of poetry to read and maintain calm. While we all carry technology in our pockets to keep us connected to the outside world, consider books or magazines to keep your eyes from tiring and your focus on what’s important.
Consider making a homemade sign to leave in the loved one’s room. Words to remind those attending to a loved one of your loved one’s name, a few tidbits about them, and a reminder, if necessary, this person experiences memory loss, etc. Some care communities will also send along paperwork which might also include a type of greeting card for the doctors. A way of saying, thank you for attending to me - and it’s important you know the real me.
Is this necessary? I’ve spent many hours in hospital and care home settings. My husband works in a hospital. We’re familiar with the demands on both sides of the patient bed. The pressure for everyone to perform admirably for the sake of someone they don’t know, and someone you love intensely, is real. The stakes are high. Eliminate the stress and tension whenever possible.
Become a Manager
“As your care recipient’s advocate, be involved, don’t accept the status quo, and don’t be afraid to voice your concerns,” writes Nancy L. Kriseman, in Mindful Caregiver: Finding Ease in the Caregiving Journey.
It’s okay to challenge what some might view as norms. Our loved ones are individuals. It only makes sense they would not fall into the “norm.” The challenge is in the communication style which we choose to adopt when speaking for our loved one.
When my mother was dying, family members wanted to come to town and visit one final time. As her ongoing caregiver for over six years, I didn’t want to leave her side. I had to trust in those members, and in the staff. However, there was an issue with one family member. Given the personality of this person, I fully expected them to walk into the care home and make demands, despite the groundwork I had laid for my mother’s peaceful goodbyes. The staff understood. They had, after all, understood my mother’s needs sometimes or anticipated them better than I could. I had been correct. That person did make demands. With a kind heart, the staff convinced that person they would ensure my mother’s needs were being met.
In the end, I didn’t have to be concerned so much about my communication style, but that of the trained staff. The most important aspect is that one remains committed to the values you believe are important to uphold.
The secret to caregiving is understanding there will be days when you feel you are advocating alone and recognizing there are always ways to give yourself some backup by being prepared.
Annette Januzzi Wick is a writer, speaker, and author of I’ll Have Some of Yours, a journey of cookies and caregiving. (Three Arch Press). A frequent contributor to Cincinnati.com, her work has appeared in Cincinnati Magazine, nextavenue.com, Still Point Arts, 3rd Act Magazine, Belt Magazine (forthcoming) and others. Visit annettejwick.com to learn more.
- To view the original version of this article visit balance.promedicaseniorcare.org/blog-posts/who-are-you-to-speak-annette-j-wick/
- Seniors Blue Book was not involved in the creation of this content.
Other Articles You May Like
Understand Aging Life Care
Aging Life Care / geriatric care management is a holistic, client-centered approach to caring for older adults or others facing ongoing health challenges. What is an Aging Life Care Professional? An Aging Life Care Professional, also known as a geriatric care manager, is a health and human services specialist who acts as a guide and advocate for families who are caring for older relatives or disabled adults. The Aging Life Care Professional is educated and experienced in any of several fields related to aging life care / care management, including, but not limited to gerontology, nursing, social work, psychology or occupational therapy. The Aging Life Care Professional assists clients in attaining their maximum functional potential. The individuals independence is encouraged, while safety and security concerns are also addressed. Aging Life Care Professionals have extensive knowledge about the costs, quality and availability of resources in their communities. Aging Life Care Professionals are members of the Aging Life Care Association (ALCA) and differ from Patient Advocates, Senior Advisors, Senior Navigators and Elder Advocates. ALCA members must meet the stringent education, experience and certification requirements of the organization, and all members are required to adhere to a strict code of ethics and standards of practice. What Services do Aging Life Care Professionals Provide? Aging Life Care Professionals provide guidance to help families ensure quality care and an optimal life for those they love through: Assessment and monitoring Planning and problem-solving Education and advocacy Family caregiver coaching Long-distance caregiving Aging Life Care Professionals are engaged to assist in a variety of areas, such as: Housing helping families evaluate and select the appropriate level of housing or residential options. Home care services determining the types of services that are right for a client and assisting the family to engage and monitor those services. Medical management attending doctor appointments; facilitating communication between doctor, client and family; and if appropriate, monitoring clients adherence to medical orders and instructions. Communication keeping family members and professionals informed as to the well-being and changing needs of the client. Social activities providing opportunities for the client to engage in social, recreational or cultural activities that enrich quality of life. Legal referring to or consulting with an elder law attorney; providing expert opinions for courts in determining level of care. Financial may include reviewing or overseeing bill paying or consulting with an accountant or clients Power of Attorney. Entitlements providing information on Federal and state entitlements; connecting families to local programs. Safety and security monitoring the client at home; recommending technologies to add to security or safety; observing changes and potential risks of exploitation or abuse. Long-distance care coordinating the care of a loved one for families that live at a distance, including crisis management. Local, cost-effective resources are identified and engaged as needed. A care plan tailored for each individuals circumstances is prepared after a comprehensive assessment. How do you know that you need an Aging Life Care Professional? You may need an Aging Life Care Professional if: The person you are caring for has limited or no family support. Your family has just become involved with helping the individual and needs direction about available services. The person you are caring for has multiple medical or psychological issues. The person you are caring for is unable to live safely in his/her current environment. Your family is either burned out or confused about care solutions. Your family has limited time and/or expertise in dealing with your loved ones chronic care needs. Your family is at odds regarding care decisions. The person you are caring for is confused about his/her own financial and/or legal situation. Your family needs education and/or direction in dealing with behaviors associated with dementia. You live at a distance from your loved one. Contact Elder Maze Solutions, an Aging Life Care provider, to learn more.
What is Aging Life Care?
What is Aging Life Care?Aging Life Care management is a holistic, client-centered approach to planning with and caring for aging adults, dependent adults, or others facing ongoing health or disability challenges. As experts in aging well, Aging Life Care Managers help older adults navigate the challenges of aging and make positive, informed decisions and plans. Their guidance leads people to the actions and decisions that ensure quality care and an optimal life for themselves or those they love, thus reducing worry, stress, and time off of work for family caregivers through:Assessment and monitoringPlanning and problem-solvingEducation and advocacyFamily caregiver coachingAging Life Care Professionals - The Experts in Aging WellThe expertise of Aging Life Care Professionals can be summarized into eight knowledge areas. Lets take a closer look:Health and Disability. From physical problems to mental health and dementia-related problems, Aging Life Care Managers interact with the health care system effectively and frequently. Aging Life Care Professionals attend doctor appointments and facilitate communication between doctor, client, and family. These professionals help determine types of services such as home health and hospice that are right for a client and assist in engaging and monitoring those services.Financial. Services may include reviewing or overseeing bill paying or consulting with a clients accountant or Power of Attorney. Aging Life Care Professionals provide information on Federal and state entitlements, connecting families to local programs when appropriate. They also help clients and families with insurance concerns, claims, and applications.Housing. Aging Life Care Professionals help families and clients evaluate and select appropriate level of housing or residential options.Families. Aging Life Care Professionals help families adjust, cope and problem-solve around long-distance and in-home caregiving, addressing care concerns, internal conflicts and differences of opinion about long-term care planning.Local Resources. Aging Life Care Professionals know the specifics of the local resources in their communities and know how services are accessed.Advocacy. Aging Life Care Professionals are strong and effective advocates for clients and their families, promoting the clients wishes with health care and other providers, ensuring that clients needs are being adequately addressed.Legal. Aging Life Care Professionals refer to legal experts, like elder law attorneys, estate planners, and Powers of Attorney. Some Aging Life Care Professionals provide expert opinion for courts in determining level of care and establishing client needs.Crisis Intervention. Aging Life Care Professionals offer crisis intervention when it is needed, helping clients navigate through emergency departments and hospitalizations, rehabilitation stays, and ensuring that adequate care is available to the client. For families that live at a distance, this can be a much-needed 24/7 emergency contact.Local, cost-effective resources are identified and engaged as needed.A care plan tailored for each individuals circumstances is prepared after a comprehensive assessment. The plan may be modified, in consultation with client and family, as circumstances change.What is an Aging Life Care Professional?An Aging Life Care Professional is a health and human services specialist who acts as a guide and advocate for families who are caring for older relatives or disabled adults. The Aging Life Care Professional is educated and experienced in any of several fields related to Aging Life Care management, including, but not limited to counseling, gerontology, mental health, nursing, occupational therapy, physical therapy, psychology, or social work; with a specialized focus on issues related to aging and elder care.The Aging Life Care Professional assists clients in attaining their maximum functional potential. The individuals independence is encouraged, while safety and security concerns are also addressed. Aging Life Care Professionals are able to address a broad range of issues related to the well-being of their client. They also have extensive knowledge about the costs, quality, and availability of resources in their communities.Aging Life Care Professionals become the coach and families or clients the team captain. Search for an Aging Life Care Professional near you.Aging Life Care Professionals are members of the Aging Life Care Association (ALCA) and differ from Patient Advocates, Senior Advisors, Senior Navigators, and Elder Advocates. ALCA members must meet stringent education, experience, and certification requirements of the organization, and all members are required to adhere to a strict Code of Ethics and Standards of Practice. For more information on membership requirements, please click here.What other services do Aging Life Care Professionals provide?While the majority of Aging Life Care clients are older adults, many also assist younger adults who face the challenges of disability or serious illness.Aging Life Care Professionals may help people who have:Physical DisabilitiesDevelopmental Disabilities, (e.g. Intellectual Disabilities, Downs Syndrome, or Autism)Brain InjuryMental Health ProblemsChronic or Serious Illnesses of any typeAging Life Care Professionals can often help parents who are concerned about a young adult or middle-aged adult child with disabilities. These life care professionals have experience and credentials to work with all ages. The life care professional conducts a comprehensive assessment and helps the family plan for the current and future needs of their adult child.How Do You Know When You Need an Aging Life Care Professional?When caregiving for an aging family member becomes overwhelming, it may be time to contact an Aging Life Care Professional.You may need an Aging Life Care Professional if the person you are caring for:has multiple medical or psychological issuesis unable to live safely in their current environmentis not pleased with current care providers and requires advocacyis confused about their own financial and/or legal situationhas limited or no family supportOr if your family:has just become involved with helping the individual and needs direction about available servicesis either burned out or confused about care solutionshas limited time and/or expertise in dealing with the individuals chronic care needs and does not live close byis at odds regarding care decisionsneeds education and/or direction in dealing with behaviors associated with dementiaIf you are looking for an Aging Life Care Professional in your area this website includes a searchable directory of our members.Back to TopWhat are the benefits of using an Aging Life Care Professional?Aging Life Care services are offered in a variety of settings. Professionals can serve the needs of their clients by providing:Personalized and compassionate service focusing on the individuals wants and needs.Accessibility care is typically available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.Continuity of care communications are coordinated between family members, doctors and other professionals, and service providers.Cost containment inappropriate placements, duplication of services, and unnecessary hospitalizations are avoided.Quality control Aging Life Care services follow ALCAs Standards of Practice and Code of Ethics.
Right at Home of Grand Junction Named 2025 In-Home Care Provider of Choice
Right at Home of Grand Junction Named 2025 In-Home Care Provider of Choice Right at Home of Grand Junction, CO received the 2025 Best of Home Care Provider of Choice Award from Activated Insights, formerly Home Care Pulse, an independent satisfaction research firm for post-acute care. Right at Home of Grand Junction has earned the award for the 5th time. Right at Home of Grand Junction and Glenwood Springs provides in-home care and assistance for seniors and adults with disabilities who want to continue living independently in their homes. Owners Dave and Meshelle McKendry are honored to receive this award. They joined the Right at Home network in 2017 and are grateful to be involved in the local community and provide much-needed support and peace of mind to families and aging loved ones.We are proudly fulfilling our mission! By delivering exceptional care, we are making a meaningful difference in our community. This dedication is why we chose this path."The Right at Home franchisor team partners with Activated Insights to gather comments from clients and caregivers of Right at Home locally owned franchise offices. Because Activated Insights is a third-party company, it is able to collect unbiased feedback via live phone interviews. The Provider of Choice Award assures consumers that Right at Home of Grand Junction is among a select few home care providers across the country that have proven their ability to provide outstanding care. The Right at Home franchisor team is thrilled to learn that Right at Home of Grand Junction has received the Provider of Choice Award, said Margaret Haynes, President and CEO of Right at Home. This prestigious Best of Home Care Award highlights the commitment of the dedicated team at Right at Home of Grand Junction to improve the quality of life for families in the local community. Right at Home had 252 local offices receive 2025 Best of Home Care Awards, topping four of the five award categories. Right at Home ranked No. 1 for Provider of Choice, Employer of Choice, Leader in Experience, and Leader in Training, and No. 2 for Top 100 Leader in Experience. To learn more about Right at Home of Grand Junction and Glenwood Springs commitment to excellence, please visit www.gjhomecare.com or phone 970.697.1331 Email: care@gjhomecare.com ABOUT RIGHT AT HOME OF GRAND JUNCTION/GLENWOOD SPRINGS:The office of Right at Home is a locally owned and operated franchise office of Right at Home, LLC, serving the communities of Mesa, Pitkin, Garfield and Eagle. ABOUT RIGHT AT HOME:Founded in 1995, Right at Home offers in-home care to seniors and adults with disabilities who want to live independently. Most Right at Home offices are independently owned and operated and directly employ and supervise all caregiving staff. Each caregiver is thoroughly screened, trained, and bonded/insured before entering a clients home. Right at Homes global office is based in Omaha, Nebraska, with more than 700 franchise locations in the U.S. and five other countries. For more information about Right at Home, visit rightathome.net or read the Right at Home blog at rightathome.net/blog. ABOUT ACTIVATED INSIGHTS:Activated Insights enables long-term care and post-acute care providers to optimize every interaction with employees and clients. By offering comprehensive capabilities in recruitment, training, retention, and experience management, we enable organizations to enhance care quality and boost employee engagement. Our data-driven approach, including industry benchmarking and recognition programs, helps providers improve satisfaction, reduce turnover, and achieve operational excellence. Activated Insights is dedicated to elevating the care experience across the continuum of home-based care, senior living, to post-acute care. For more information, visit: https://activatedinsights.com/.
Local Services By This Author
Lely Palms Senior Living Community
Assisted Living 1000 Lely Palms Drive, Naples, Florida, 34113Our family of assisted and independent living communities offer a sense of home with a variety of amenities.We know you have your own individual routines and interests, capabilities and needs and we strive to accommodate each resident's individuality.
Lely Palms Senior Living Community
Independent Living 1000 Lely Palms Dr., Naples, Florida, 34113Lely Palms Independent Living offers a variety of apartments (studio, 1 & 2 bedrooms) and 2 bedroom villas. Full Service rental plans are designed to simplify your lifestyle with many services included. General Rental plans allow you to customize the services you desire while not having to pay for those you don't need. No matter what plan you choose, you will be glad to call Lely Palms Retirement Community home.
Lely Palms Senior Living Community
Housing - Other Types 1000 Lely Palms Dr., Naples, Florida, 34113Located on 28 acres of beautifully tropical landscaped property in Naples, Florida, Lely Palms Retirement Community offers independent living for persons ages 55 and over. Lely Palms also offers the only retirement villa rentals in Naples. Choose from an all-inclusive rental package, general rental, or trial stay with an array of floor plans including studios, alcoves, one and two bedroom apartments. Our rental community is designed for your active and healthy lifestyle.Independent Living Apartments and VillasFull-service rental plans for those looking to simplify their lifestyleGeneral rental plans to customize and add the services you desireOne of the few Naples area Continuing Care Retirement Communities (CCRC) with rental units