How to Cope as a Grieving Widow

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Talkspace

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Mar 14, 2025

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Florida - Southwest

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Losing a spouse or a life partner is one of life’s most painful, profound losses. Trying to navigate a new world without your partner can leave you feeling shattered. Grief is a personal, complex journey, and there’s no single or right way to handle it. Research shows that the first year after becoming a widow or a widower is the most harmful to mental health. Recent widows report drastically higher rates of depression, poor social functioning, and lower physical and overall mental health functioning. Thus, it’s vital that you find support and coping strategies to get you through this time. 

If you or someone you care about is a surviving spouse experiencing widow grief, there are steps you can take to help you process your pain and slowly begin to rebuild your life.

Allow Yourself to Feel and Process the Grief

Grief is a natural response to loss. It’s crucial to allow yourself to feel the wide range of emotions associated with it. Sadness, anger, denial, confusion, guilt, or moments of peace and joy are all part of the grieving process. It isn’t linear — there’s no grief timeline or right or wrong way to “do” it. 

Healing takes time, and you can’t rush it even if you’re feeling pressured to move on by others. Understanding the stages of grief can help you navigate this challenging time. Sit with your emotions without judgment as often as you need. Some days will be heavier than others, and that’s OK.

Lean on Your Support Network

Grief feels inherently isolating, but you don’t have to — and shouldn’t try to — go through it alone. Now, more than ever, is the time for you to lean on friends, family members, and your community. Allow them to offer you comfort, and don’t feel obligated to return the favor immediately. 

If reaching out is too hard or overwhelming, start small. Accept an invitation for coffee, attend a local support group meeting, or call a close friend. Surrounding yourself with people who care about you will ease the burden and remind you that you’re not alone. 

Consider Professional Grief Counseling

While your inner circle can offer tremendous support, you might need more professional support. Working with a grief counselor or therapist can provide a different level of healing. Mental health professionals trained in grief counseling can guide you as you process your pain and emotions. They’ll utilize grief therapy techniques to teach you coping skills that will get you through the hard days. 

“While each person’s path in grief is unique, you do not have to walk it alone. There are so many benefits of talking to a therapist who specializes in grief or attending a grief group. Being able to get support during this challenging time not only decreases your isolation, it allows you to get support and gain tools to help at a time when it’s needed most. In a grief group it’s also an opportunity to share with others which can be a powerful healing experience. Grief does not have a time line, give yourself grace and know that your process is as unique as the relationship you had with your spouse/partner.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R

If you’ve never done therapy before, start with a consultation to ensure it’s a good fit. Online therapy is a flexible, accessible option that can be less daunting since you won’t have to leave the house to get to your appointment. 

Find Solace in Routine and Self Care

As a grieving widow, having a routine can give you a sense of stability and help you deal with grief. Following a plan for the day — making your bed, having a cup of tea, or going for a walk in the park — can ground you and bring moments of normalcy.

It’s essential that you prioritize self-care right now. Nourish your mind and body by:

  • Eating healthy meals
  • Staying hydrated
  • Doing yoga
  • Working out
  • Reading a great book
  • Doing anything you enjoy
  • Getting enough rest
  • Taking breaks in your day when you need to 

Honor the Memory of Your Loved One

Celebrating your spouse’s life can be comforting and bring meaning to your grief. You might consider:

  • Creating a memory box with cherished letters, photos, or keepsakes
  • Planting a tree or garden in their honor
  • Writing down your best memories, stories, and plans to keep their legacy alive

You can also find small ways to remember them in daily life. Listen to their favorite song, cook their favorite meal, or keep doing a tradition both of you loved. Honoring your loved one in purposeful ways can bring you a sense of peace. 

Take Small Steps Toward Building a New Life

It might seem impossible today, but you will move forward eventually. This doesn’t mean you’re forgetting your spouse — it just means you’re finding ways to carry their memory while you start a new chapter for yourself. You can do this slowly — even small steps are worth the effort. With each one you take, the widow grief will subside more, and eventually, you’ll rediscover joy. 

“While grief does not have a timeline, many people find it helpful to take small meaningful steps toward their healing. For some, that might be returning to work or to the church you attended, taking a walk on the same path you used to with your spouse/partner, attending the same restaurant for lunch with a trusted friend or family member, watching a favorite tv show, or volunteering at a new organization. It doesn’t matter what it actually is— it’s whatever is meaningful to you.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R

Explore or rediscover activities, events, places, or hobbies that once fulfilled you. Try joining a book club, learning a new skill, or volunteering in your community — activities that many older adults and widows find fulfilling. By putting yourself out there slowly, you’ll find that doors begin to open back up. Remember, there’s no rush to get there. Take one step at a time when you’re ready.

Embracing Healing at Your Own Pace

Moving from a grieving widow to a place of acceptance is a personal journey. There’s no finish line for grief. Be gentle with yourself and honor wherever you are in the process. Above all, know that you’re not alone. There are so many resources available when you need them.

“Healing is not linear, it goes up, down, sideways, and often in roller coaster loop de loops. The key is to allow the process to be what it is. You are not alone. Seek support from trusted friends, family, and a licensed mental health professional or grief counselor as you navigate your unique healing.”

– Talkspace therapist Jill Daino, LCSW-R

If you’re ready to start working through your grief, Talkspace offers convenient and affordable support with online therapy covered by Medicare and many other insurance plans. Working with an experienced grief therapist will ensure you have expert help as you navigate this difficult time — and you can even do it from the privacy and comfort of your own home.

Online grief counseling can be a vital step in your healing journey. Connect with a licensed therapist through Talkspace today and take the first step toward finding comfort and hope.

Sources:

  1. https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2003/09/widowhood

Talkspace articles are written by experienced mental health-wellness contributors; they are grounded in scientific research and evidence-based practices. Articles are extensively reviewed by our team of clinical experts (therapists and psychiatrists of various specialties) to ensure content is accurate and on par with current industry standards.

Our goal at Talkspace is to provide the most up-to-date, valuable, and objective information on mental health-related topics in order to help readers make informed decisions.

Articles contain trusted third-party sources that are either directly linked to in the text or listed at the bottom to take readers directly to the source.

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Medication for Anger Management

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However, anger that you cant control or thats increasing in frequency or severity should be addressed. If youre looking for professional mental health support to help you manage your anger, Talkspace has experienced therapists and psychiatrists ready to work with you.You dont have to let your angry outbursts control your life. Its possible to learn coping skills and techniques through in-person or online therapy, lifestyle changes, and possibly medication for anger that will help you manage symptoms of anger so you can develop and nurture fulfilling, positive, healthy relationships without anger getting the best of you.Sources:Romero-Martnez , Murciano-Mart S, Moya-Albiol L. Is sertraline a good pharmacological strategy to control anger? results of a systematic review. Behavioral Sciences. 2019;9(5):57. doi:10.3390/bs9050057. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6562745/. Accessed June 2, 2023.Amore M, DAndrea M, Fagiolini A. Treatment of agitation with Lorazepam in clinical practice: A systematic review. Frontiers in Psychiatry. 2021;12. doi:10.3389/fpsyt.2021.628965. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyt.2021.628965/full. Accessed June 2, 2023.Sajdeya R, Joseph V, Stetten NE, et al. Reasons for Marijuana Use and Its Perceived Effectiveness in Therapeutic and Recreational Marijuana Users Among People Living with HIV in Florida. Cannabis: Publication of the Research Society on Marijuana. 2021;4(1).  https://publications.sciences.ucf.edu/cannabis/index.php/Cannabis/article/view/75. Accessed June 2, 2023.Ansell EB, Laws HB, Roche MJ, Sinha R. Effects of marijuana use on impulsivity and hostility in daily life. Drug and Alcohol Dependence. 2015;148:136-142. doi:10.1016/j.drugalcdep.2014.12.029. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4330120/. 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How to Calm Down From Anger: 9 Helpful Tips

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Try regularly doing the following to keep a positive attitude so your anger doesnt take over:Working out regularlyJournaling for mental healthPracticing yogaMeditatingFocusing on healthy communication skillsHow to develop a healthier response to angerIf you want to learn how to stay calm when angry, it can help to focus on your natural response to upsetting situations. It will take work, but you can reprogram your brain so that instead of reacting with aggression, criticism, or sarcasm, you learn to calmly express yourself in ways other than anger. Identifying triggers so you can avoid them or manage your reactions is key. Talking to a behavioral professional, practicing meditation or mindfulness, and learning to recognize your triggers can help you develop a healthier response to anger. Talkspace therapist Cynthia Catchings, LCSW-SSeeking professional help for anger managementIf you have anger management issues and are struggling to get them under control on your own, it might be time to seek professional help. Therapy for anger management can be a great way to learn how to remain calm when angry, especially if your intense emotions are starting to affect relationships with others.Manage Your Anger with TalkspaceThe good news is you dont have to live in a perpetual state of anger. You can take proactive steps to overcome your anger response patterns and build healthy, mutually-rewarding relationships where joy and peace not anger are the foundations. Getting professional support from an online therapy provider like Talkspace can be a great first step. Reach out to Talkspace today to learn how to stay calm when angry emotions take over. Talkspace makes the process easy, convenient, and affordable, with therapy from the comfort of your home. Sources:Ma X, Yue Z-Q, Gong Z-Q, et al. The effect of diaphragmatic breathing on attention, negative affect and stress in healthy adults. Frontiers in Psychology. 2017;8. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2017.00874 . https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5455070/. Accessed June 3, 2023. Malhotra P. Exercise and its Impact on Anger Management. Acta Scientific Medical Sciences. 2019;3(4):132-137. https://actascientific.com/ASMS/pdf/ASMS-03-0278.pdf. June 3, 2023.Talkspace articles are written by experienced mental health-wellness contributors; they are grounded in scientific research and evidence-based practices. Articles are extensively reviewed by our team of clinical experts (therapists and psychiatrists of various specialties) to ensure content is accurate and on par with current industry standards.Our goal at Talkspace is to provide the most up-to-date, valuable, and objective information on mental health-related topics in order to help readers make informed decisions.Articles contain trusted third-party sources that are either directly linked to in the text or listed at the bottom to take readers directly to the source.

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Talkspace

Health & Wellness 622 3rd Avenue, New York, New York, 10017

Online Mental Health TherapyMental health support from anywhere, available fast Talkspace provides mental health support privately and conveniently online. Receive live video therapy appointments from a highly qualified licensed therapist covered by your Medicare or Medicare Advantage plan with little wait.  Individual therapy, psychiatry, or couples counseling covered by your private insurance plan is also readily available.Talkspace provides:A private space to discuss relationships, retirement, grief, health conditions, financial concerns, life changes, and anything thats on your mindLive one-on-one therapy sessions from your computer or phoneTreatment for over 150 mental health conditions including anxiety, stress, grief, depression, OCD, BPD, and moreMessaging therapy allows you to share with your therapist 24/7 and receive feedback and advice, and is proven to be as effective as traditional therapy..Connect with a therapist within daysTalkspace will match you with a therapist who is licensed in your state and should be a good fit for your needs. Start communicating with your therapist in 1-2 days.Receive care on your scheduleTalkspace removes all the scheduling hassles so you can get mental health support anytime, anywhere. Send your therapist text, voice, or video messages through the secure Talkspace platform and hear back daily, 5 days / weekStart your care journey with Talkspace today, visit www.talkspace.com

Talkspace

Addiction Services 622 3rd Avenue, New York, New York, 10017

Online Mental Health TherapyMental health support from anywhere, available fast Talkspace provides mental health support privately and conveniently online. Receive live video therapy appointments from a highly qualified licensed therapist covered by your Medicare or Medicare Advantage plan with little wait.  Individual therapy, psychiatry, or couples counseling covered by your private insurance plan is also readily available.Talkspace provides:A private space to discuss relationships, retirement, grief, health conditions, financial concerns, life changes, and anything thats on your mindLive one-on-one therapy sessions from your computer or phoneTreatment for over 150 mental health conditions including anxiety, stress, grief, depression, OCD, BPD, and moreMessaging therapy allows you to share with your therapist 24/7 and receive feedback and advice, and is proven to be as effective as traditional therapy..Connect with a therapist within daysTalkspace will match you with a therapist who is licensed in your state and should be a good fit for your needs. Start communicating with your therapist in 1-2 days.Receive care on your scheduleTalkspace removes all the scheduling hassles so you can get mental health support anytime, anywhere. Send your therapist text, voice, or video messages through the secure Talkspace platform and hear back daily, 5 days / weekStart your care journey with Talkspace today, visit www.talkspace.com