Moving an Elderly Parent into your Home

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Griswold Home Care

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Posted on

Sep 03, 2023

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Florida - Southwest

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As our parents age, it's common for their role to change from a caregiver to someone who requires care. In situations where a parent is no longer able to live independently, it may be necessary for them to move in with their child. As the child in this scenario, this decision can be a difficult one to make, as it involves a significant shift in family dynamics and a change in lifestyle for both parties. In this blog, we'll discuss what you need to know about bringing an elderly parent into your home and providing care for them as they age.

Should Your Aging Parents Live With You?

If you're contemplating the decision to move your elderly parents or loved ones into your home, it's important to approach it with careful consideration. You often hear people say, “I promised her I’d never put her in a nursing home.” or, “Dad told me he never wanted to live in one of those places.” As long as the situation is safe for everyone involved, keeping aging parents at home is a wonderful thing to do. However, there are multiple factors that should be taken into account before making any final decisions. By taking the time to explore these questions thoroughly and any other concerns that may arise, you will be better prepared to make an informed decision that benefits everyone involved.

  1. Do your parents have needs that require extra care? Before your parent(s) move into your home, it's important to determine the level of support they need and what you can provide. This means being honest about your own abilities and limitations and considering the resources available to you.
  2. Do you get along with the parent? If you were at odds with your parent while growing up, your differences will not change dramatically. However, if you were always able to settle a conflict, that relationship should continue amicably.
  3. Do your children and spouse get along with the parent? Furthermore, will they be able to adjust to a new person living in the house?
  4. Will your parent be able to live by the rules of the house? Dynamics are shifting, which means your parent will have to follow YOUR rules now. Will they be able to make that adjustment, including adjusting their levels of independence?
  5. What will your loved one do when you're not there? When you or your spouse are working, and your children are at school, your parent may feel lonely. It's important to prevent isolation for their overall well-being. There are various options to consider, such as adult day care, companion care services, volunteering, and more.

Can You Afford to Take Care of Your Parent?

While it is natural to have deep feelings of love and respect for our parents, it is also important to be realistic about the financial impact their care may have on our households. According to AARP’s 2021 Caregiving Out-of-Pocket Costs Study, annual costs for caregiving tasks or supplies for an aging parent, average more than $7,200 per year. So what choices do you have? Here are some financial factors to consider with an elderly parent moving in:

  • Start by making it a team effort. Talk to siblings and the parent, themselves, about budgeting and expenses. Open communication and transparency will be key to establishing a successful financial strategy for the household.

  • Get advice from an expert. Living with children for free may affect the eligibility of elderly individuals for Medicaid or full social security benefits, as these benefits are based on income and expenses. An attorney or a social security representative can help you determine how much your parent should pay to keep their benefits.

  • Consider charging rent to elderly parents. To determine how much to charge, figure out how much a room would cost in a senior care facility and then factor in expenses such as groceries. Remember to work together and come to an agreement on a rate that's balanced and fair for everyone involved!

  • Claim your parent as dependents when filing taxes. Claiming a dependent can possibly offer tax deductions and ease your financial burden. However, it is crucial to ensure that you meet all the necessary criteria and rules before proceeding with any decisions.

Five Tips for Preparing Your Home for Elderly Parents

Preparing your home for elderly parents can be overwhelming. However, it is essential to make appropriate house adjustments to ensure their new living arrangements are comfortable, convenient, and peaceful. Here are a few things you can do when preparing a space for elderly family members in your home:

  1. Make Your Safe and Accessible: Ensure that your home is safe and accessible for your elderly parent. Remove tripping hazards, install handrails in key areas like stairs and bathrooms, and make sure pathways are clear. Consider modifications like a walk-in shower, grab bars, and a ramp if necessary. Arrange furniture to accommodate mobility aids such as walkers or wheelchairs.

  2. Address Health and Medical Needs: Consult with your parent's healthcare professionals to understand their specific medical needs and any required assistance with medications or treatments. Set up a dedicated area for medication management and keep a record of their medical history, appointments, and prescriptions. If necessary, enlist the help of a home healthcare professional or nurse to assist with medical care.

  3. Develop a Daily Routine: Establish a daily routine that considers your parent's needs and preferences. A structured schedule can provide stability and reduce stress for both of you. Include time for meals, exercise, social interactions, and rest. Be flexible and make adjustments as needed, considering their health and abilities.

  4. Seek Support and Education: Caring for an elderly parent can be emotionally and physically demanding. Look for local support groups or online communities where you can connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Consider attending workshops or seminars to learn about caregiving techniques, resources, and coping strategies.

  5. Set Boundaries and Communicate Openly: Communication is vital in any caregiving situation. Discuss expectations, boundaries, and roles with your parent and other family members involved in the caregiving process. Be open about your feelings, concerns, and limitations. Remember that self-care is crucial! Don't hesitate to ask for help when needed and take breaks to recharge.

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Planning Ahead: How Naborforce Supports Families and Seniors Through the Aging Process

The aging process often begins subtly, with gradual changes that seem manageable. One day, your parent is fully independent, taking care of daily tasks without issue. Then, suddenly, it feels as though the aging process accelerates, bringing new challenges all at once. This rapid shift can be difficult for family members, especially if they haven't planned ahead.Why Aging Can Seem to Happen SuddenlyWhile aging typically unfolds slowly, research suggests it doesnt always progress in a straight line. A study published in Nature Aging found that aging tends to occur in bursts, where rapid changes in areas like metabolism, immune health, and muscle strength happen. These bursts often occur around the age of 60, potentially leading to abrupt physical declines (SciTech Daily)(AARP).If you or your loved one wait too long to prepare, you may find yourselves scrambling to deal with the sudden onset of new health challenges. This lack of preparation often leaves caregivers feeling overwhelmed, under-equipped, and burned out.The Pitfalls of Delaying PreparationMany families delay planning for their parents aging, assuming they'll manage when the time comes. Others might avoid the topic altogether because it can be emotionally challenging to discuss. Unfortunately, this wait-and-see approach often leads to caregiver burnout and strained relationships, as families are forced to juggle urgent medical needs, emotional stress, and time-consuming responsibilities without a solid plan in place.If youre struggling to discuss getting help with your aging parent, check out some of our tips here. Remember, asking for assistance during the aging process doesnt mean youre powerless!How Naborforce Can Help You Plan AheadRather than waiting for a health crisis, Naborforce provides consistent support for families throughout the aging journey. As seniors age, they often need help with simple taskslike grocery shopping or getting to appointmentsthat can quickly become time-consuming for loved ones. With Naborforce, you can arrange for a friendly Nabor to assist, allowing your parent to stay independent longer while giving you peace of mind.By building a relationship with Naborforce early, your parent will already be accustomed to receiving help. When aging accelerates, youll have a reliable support system in placesomeone familiar with your parent who can step in to help with everyday tasks. This helps ease your parents transition while giving you the time and space to focus on your own responsibilities.The Importance of Having a PlanThe key to supporting your parent as they age is to start planning before their needs become urgent. With Naborforce, you can establish a flexible plan that evolves as your parents needs change. Whether its an occasional visit or regular check-ins, Naborforce can tailor its services to fit your schedule and your parents preferences. By starting early, you ensure that you and your parent have the right support in place before bigger challenges arise.Naborforce is just one of many resources available to help with the aging process. Other tools include financial planning, setting up a trust and estate plan, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, using technology designed for senior living, and understanding the care continuum.Getting Started with NaborforceIts easy to get started with Naborforce. You can customize the level of support you need, from occasional assistance to more regular visits. Take the proactive step of setting up care before it becomes urgent, so your parent can stay comfortable, independent, and supported as they age.A Helping Hand for Older Adults - Naborforce 844-696-2267 Were Naborforce. We match older adults who need a little help and kindness with Nabors eager to provide it, strengthening the communities we serve.Everyone can use a little help. Help around the house. Help running errands. Help preparing a meal. Help by just being a friend! Our goal is to promote joyous and independent aging and living while providing peace of mind to families.

For women, eldercare should not mean sacrificing your career

For women, eldercare should not mean sacrificing your careerMany women, especially those in mid-career, find themselves facing the difficult decision of whether to leave the workforce to care for aging parents. The demands of eldercare can pile up with little warning or predictability and quickly become overwhelming. The "easiest" solution for many women in this position may seem like stepping away from their professional lives altogether.However, leaving the workforce can have long-term, unseen consequencesfinancially, emotionally, and professionally. Before women make this decision, we want to bring to light to some of the costs of stepping away, as well as share options that are available to help women care for aging parents or loved ones without sacrificing their career.The elephant in the room - what about men?It's a systemic problem that the large majority of caregiving responsibilities fall on women. We believe fully this should not be the case - and will continue to advocate for a future where men and women are expected to share, and do share, these responsibilities more equally. That said, this article is going to focus on the impact of eldercare on women, and options available, because the data shows the women are the ones who are much more likely to pay the price of eldercare.Female caregivers are more likely than males to ask for a less demanding job, take unpaid leave, or give up work entirely to support caregivingWomen lose an estimated $325K over their lifetime due to caregivingThe Unseen Costs of Leaving the WorkforceWomen who exit the workforce early face immediate income loss, diminished retirement savings, and a reduction in Social Security benefits. AARP reports that caregivers can expect to spend an average of $7K annually on out-of-pocket expenses.Additionally, exiting the workforce comes with professional setbacks that may be hard to recover from. Studies show that women who take time off for caregiving often find it difficult to re-enter their fields, and when they do, they may face lower wages, fewer opportunities for advancement, or the need to start in less demanding roles.The Unseen Costs of "Daughterhood"A less recognized aspect of womens caregiving burden is eldercare (i.e. daughterhood), which is frequently overshadowed by the attention given to childcare (i.e. motherhood). While businesses have made strides in supporting working mothers, they have largely ignored the unique challenges posed by eldercare. The emotional and physical toll of eldercare, which often includes managing chronic illnesses, dementia, and end-of-life care, cannot be underestimated.According to the Federal Reserve, four times as many people have left the workforce due to adult caregiving compared to childcare, yet corporate policies and benefits packages rarely address these realities.Why You Shouldn't Quit: There Are OptionsBalancing work, children, aging parents, mental and physical health, a "clean" home, and the semblance of a social life - it's simply not sustainable. It would make Superwoman run for the exit. It's no wonder that women leave their jobs in order to quickly take something off their plate. But before putting in your notice, let's talk about resources and options that may be available.Workplace Benefits: Find out what your company offers. Some offer paid caregiver leave, flexible work schedules, Employee Assistance Programs (EAPs) that provide counseling and eldercare resources.Even if your employer is moving away from remote work post-pandemic, you can advocate for more flexibility, such as flexible hours or a partial work-from-home arrangement.According to experts, a flexible workplace arrangement is often the most important factor for caregivers trying to juggle their professional and personal lives.External Support Systems: there are local and national organizations that can provide assistance. Naborforce is one of these organizations - our founder Paige Wilson lived all of the stark truths discussed in this article, and that is why she decided to do something about it! And if Naborforce isn't in your area or isn't an option for you - there are other resources to check out: care.com, Bright Horizons, home care agencies, caregiving forums, etc.Note: Naborforce partners with employers to provide discounted hourly rates. If your employer doesn't have Naborforce as an option, reach out to us and we will see if there is an opportunity to collaborate!Talk to your people: Many organizations are beginning to create employee resource groups for caregivers, offering a safe space to share experiences and tips for managing eldercare. These groups can be a lifeline for employees who feel isolated in their caregiving roles.Making Eldercare an Employee BenefitEmployers play a crucial role in supporting women who are caregivers. Unfortunately, 79% of caregivers do not have access to benefits that support them in this role.Supporting working women is not just about helping parents; its about addressing the needs of adult daughters (and sons) who are balancing caregiving with their professional lives. As 10,000 people turn 65 every day in the U.S., this challenge is only going to grow. Employers must adapt to this reality if they want to retain top female talent.The Bottom Line: You Have OptionsWhile caregiving can feel like an all-consuming role, women should not have to choose between their careers and their families. By tapping into workplace benefits, seeking flexible arrangements, and exploring external resources, women can navigate the challenges of eldercare without sacrificing their professional futures.A Helping Hand for Older Adults - Naborforce 844-696-2267 Were Naborforce. We match older adults who need a little help and kindness with Nabors eager to provide it, strengthening the communities we serve.Everyone can use a little help. Help around the house. Help running errands. Help preparing a meal. Help by just being a friend! Our goal is to promote joyous and independent aging and living while providing peace of mind to families.

Advice for Caregivers: Helping Your Aging Loved One

As your parents age, you may find yourself taking on the role of caregiver, especially if they wish to remain in their own home. While caring for aging parents can be rewarding, it also presents unique challenges. This comprehensive guide offers essential advice for caregivers navigating this important responsibility.Creating a Caregiving PlanDeveloping a structured approach is crucial when caring for aging parents. Start by creating an elder care checklist to ensure you're addressing all aspects of their well-being:Assess their living situation and home safetyReview financial and legal mattersEvaluate health and medical needsConsider emotional and social supportPlan for emergenciesA well-organized caregiving plan helps manage tasks efficiently and reduces stress for both you and your loved one.Assessing Living Arrangements and SafetyOne of the first steps in caring for elderly parents is evaluating their living situation:Conduct a thorough home safety assessmentInstall grab bars and improve lightingRemove tripping hazardsConsider a medical alert systemExplore aging in place options or assisted living if necessaryEnsuring a safe environment is crucial for maintaining your loved one's independence and well-being.Managing Financial and Legal MattersAddressing financial and legal concerns is a critical aspect of elder care:Review bank accounts, investments, and assetsInvestigate long-term care insurance and government benefitsEnsure essential legal documents are in place:Valid willPower of attorney for finances and healthcareAdvance directive or living willOrganizing these matters early can prevent complications and provide peace of mind.Coordinating Health and Medical CareEffective management of your loved one's health is paramount:Compile a list of medications and dosagesSchedule and attend medical appointmentsCoordinate care between healthcare providersMonitor for changes in health or behaviorAssess needs for assistance with activities of daily living (ADLs)Regular communication with healthcare professionals ensures your loved one receives appropriate care.Providing Emotional and Social SupportMaintaining your loved one's emotional well-being is as important as physical care:Watch for signs of depression or anxietyEncourage social interactions and activitiesConsider counseling or support groupsResearch local senior centers or community programsArrange transportation for social outingsKeeping your loved one engaged and connected can significantly improve their quality of life.Practicing Self-Care as a CaregiverCaring for yourself is essential when caring for others:Set realistic expectations and boundariesJoin a caregiver support groupMaintain your own health through regular check-upsIdentify backup caregivers for breaksExplore respite care optionsRemember, taking care of yourself allows you to provide better care for your loved one.Effective Communication and Family InvolvementOpen communication is key to successful caregiving:Hold regular family meetings to discuss care plansAssign roles and responsibilities among family membersAddress conflicts or concerns openlyKeep a caregiving journal to track changesShare updates with family members regularlyInvolving family members can distribute responsibilities and provide a support network.Preparing for EmergenciesBeing ready for unexpected situations is crucial:Create an emergency contact listDevelop a plan for natural disasters or medical emergenciesEnsure easy access to important documents and medicationsProper preparation can make a significant difference in crisis situations.Considering Professional HelpSometimes, additional support may be necessary:Evaluate the need for in-home care servicesResearch reputable home care agenciesConsider hiring a geriatric care manager for complex situationsProfessional assistance can complement family caregiving efforts and provide specialized expertise.Caring for aging parents is a journey that requires patience, dedication, and adaptability. By following this advice for caregivers and utilizing resources like an elder care checklist, you can provide comprehensive support for your loved one while maintaining your own well-being. Remember, every family's situation is unique, and it's important to tailor your approach to your specific circumstances. With proper planning and support, you can navigate the challenges of caregiving while cherishing the time spent with your aging loved one.Contact The Caring Mission today for a free assessment and to learn more.

Local Services By This Author

Griswold Home Care

Home Health 9200 Bonita Beach Road Southeast, Bonita Springs, Florida, 34135

Griswold is More Than Home Care. Its Peace of Mind.Griswold offers compassionate in-home care for those who want support to live where they love. With over four decades of experience and a storied legacy of compassion and integrity, we focus on the people we meet and the connections we make. It is our privilege to support your unique needs with respect, empathy, and dedicated attention so you can Live Assured, without the weight of worry.Griswold is an award-winning pioneer in the non-medical home care industry. We believe Care Professionals are the foundation of our success, and our commitment to innovation is based on our desire to improve the lives of everyone we touch in the communities we serve. We focus on personal care, homemaking, companionship, and support for those with conditions, illnesses, or injuries.With almost 200 locations in 32 states, Griswolds reach continues to grow. While each location benefits from the collective expertise of the national network, our deep local community ties are what make us special.