Arden Courts of Naples

Recently, I attended a college football game at Notre Dame. In our section, we watched as an older gentleman had trouble walking down the three steps to his seat near us. Later, we were informed this would likely be the final game hed attend due to aging and memory issues. Luckily, the ushers knew how to help accomplish his goal.What struck me was the reaction of the crowd surrounding him. My husband, a longtime supporter of my work in the dementia field as well as a favorite of my mothers, immediately jumped up to help the man. Others watched, some with compassion. Some with an odd fascination. It was clear many fans in our section were not familiar with the term dementia friendly.Dementia-Friendly CommunitiesAccording to Dementia Friendly America, a dementia friendly community is a village, town, city or county that is informed, safe and respectful of individuals with the disease, their families and caregivers and provides supportive options that foster quality of life.  In the case of the above, it was clear many fans had encountered someone with dementia, and therefore, made the day a success for the older gentleman.During the times I escorted my mother out to restaurants, servers occasionally gave me a confused stare. Or the servers were rude if I had to excuse myself from the table to chase my mother around, like one might a toddler. As a society, weve come a long way from that viewpoint. Some of the change has to do with cities and other entities adopting the ways and means to bring greater awareness of the challenges of someone with dementia in their midst. The progress also has to do with us. Weve availed ourselves of the knowledge required to ensure others in difficult accessibility situations, whether in libraries, cafes, or at social events, are comfortable. We need to be comfortable with it too. Once I began speaking up on behalf of my mother, I felt a new confidence in taking her wherever I went. Wherever I belonged, she did too.Tips for Dementia-Friendly SurroundingsAs stated above, being dementia-friendly begins with each of us in any home setting. I once left an onion on the kitchen counter during my mothers visit. The first thing she placed in her mouth was the entire bulb. The onion possibly appeared as an apple to her. There were other dangerous food items left on the counter which included a jalapeno pepper.  I luckily grabbed the jalapeno pepper before she spotted it.The Alzheimers Foundation of America (AFA) has a few suggestions for making any home environment accommodating and dementia friendly beginning with a safety check, which should always be the first step. Here are a few other suggestions:Consider paint color choices for walls. Blue provides a calm and cooling effect, while red ignites agitation. Contrasting colors help with vision perceptions, so one might understand when they have moved from one room to the next. Recognizing older adults often have eating challenges, the AFA also suggests using contrasting dishware color with food being served to help entice someone to eat.Label cabinets, entryways and exits, as well as other rooms. My mother retained her ability to read and sound out words until her final months. While not always comprehending the nature of the label, the consistent presence of those words offered comfort. They were words shed known longer than me, words she encountered all the time. She considered it her job to read them every day.Technology continues to play a larger role in caregiving, with home video cameras, remote controls for thermostats inside ones home, and the use of modern interactive devices to schedule reminders for meals, phone calls, or medications. Like friends of mine who tracked their teenagers via car or phone, there are user-friendly and acceptable methods in which to keep track of our loved ones when we cant be with them.Dementia impacts every aspect of our day-to-day lives, including attendance at a college football game. The AFA (Alzheimers Foundation of America) maintains a dementia-friendly home model on their website as a visual starting point to ensure our loved ones live on in safety, including when they visit our homes. Thankfully, theres not an onion on the virtual counter to tempt a loved one into ingesting it.Annette Januzzi Wick is a writer, speaker, and author of Ill Have Some of Yours, a journey of cookies and caregiving. (Three Arch Press). A frequent contributor to Cincinnati.com, her work has appeared in Cincinnati Magazine, nextavenue.com, Still Point Arts, 3rd Act Magazine, Ovunque Siamo, Belt Magazine, Creative Nonfiction, and Italian Americana (forthcoming). Visit annettejwick.com to learn more.

About the time my mother developed dementia, my son entered high school. For service hours, he chose to volunteer at a senior living community near his school. Twice a week, he and his classmates walked to the facility, played cards or music with the residents, and ate ice cream together.I often suspected his choice was motivated by watching his grandmother slowly recede into the past. Later, when my mother moved closer and progressed further in her disease, my son would have the opportunity to put his new caregiving skills into practice.Young family members are uniquely qualified to interact with aging adults. They do not have the preconceived notions, nor past regrets, which interfere with kindnesses they are capable of offering.Tips to Involve Teens in CaregivingTechnology continues to evolve at a rapid pace. It has surpassed many of us, including me, whose degree is in computer science, but not the younger generation. They can locate information on a palm-sized computer which we cannot even read due to declining eyesight. They also have the patience in sharing their expertise (they like to gloat about it too). Many apps for iPads and iPhones exist to entertain aging adults or keep their brains engaged. Sometimes electronics are seen as a divide between young and old. In this case, tech toys and apps are bridges teens can cross to interact with older adults while also keeping themselves amused.Cleaning is always a sticky subject in our household. My son, as was typical of most teenaged boys, did not exist in the neatest of bedrooms. His athleticism, which he liked to brag about, was put to good use in cleaning his bedroom or mowing the lawn while I busied myself caring for my mother. When finished with doctors visits or time with my loved one, I was free to drive him to basketball or a sleepover party. Most kids are not inclined toward chores unless the result involves something for them.After he returned home from college during holidays, he joined me on many visits to see Mom. My mothers face lit up at his presence. They had a unique bond when he was a baby, living somewhat far away from her. She and my father became his caregiver for a time while I took care of my first husband. Now, the tables had turned. He walked with her outside, played a few Dean Martin tunes on his iPhone for her to listen to, and made sure she was loaded down with cookies, the same way she did with him.In my mothers care home, there lived a woman whose grandson brought her Burger King once a week. He was about twenty years old, fresh-faced, and tall. Whenever my mother spotted him, she pointed and called out, Hey, you! She wasnt after his burgers and fries. Okay, maybe she was. She was after his youthfulnesshow he probably reminded her of her grandson. How the bounce in his step briefly for one moment, translated into a bounce in her heart. Hidden Dangers of Teen CaregivingWhile its important to teach our children responsibilities and respect for aging adults, it is equally important for our societal systems to recognize when a family needs more help or resources, especially if they are relying on teenaged children.According to the American Psychological Association (APA), in a report titled, According to Young Caregivers in the U.S., over 49% of those aged 8-18 reported spending a lot of time caregiving. Thirty percent of those in the report helping with medications. Seventeen percent help loved ones communicate with professional caregivers. Studies also showed many of these caregivers were in single-parent, low income, minority household. In most cases, they were children and caregivers.Studies also showed child caregivers tended to exhibit more anxious or depressive behavior than non-caregivers, as reported by parents. They were more likely to have trouble getting along in school, with teachers or other students.Parenting is hard, especially when we are also parenting our parents or working outside the structures of caregiving to provide for our family. We want our children to have more balance in their life, while we struggle to maintain that in ours. Our children gain in compassion when they are exposed to aging adults. It should not set limits their education or well-being.Annette Januzzi Wick is a writer, speaker, and author of Ill Have Some of Yours, a journey of cookies and caregiving. (Three Arch Press). A frequent contributor to Cincinnati.com, her work has appeared in Cincinnati Magazine, nextavenue.com, Still Point Arts, 3rd Act Magazine, Ovunque Siamo, Belt Magazine, Creative Nonfiction, and Italian Americana (forthcoming).

The cold weather, snow and ice always bring an increased risk of injury and hazards. However, individuals living with Alzheimers or a related dementia may be more susceptible to risks.The number one suggestion I make to families and caregivers of those living with Alzheimers disease or related dementia is to always be prepared, shares April Suva-Surovi, a senior community relations specialist with Arden Courts ProMedica Memory Care. Be prepared for anything that can happen, even if you think your loved one would never do it.Follow these tips to avoid dangerous situations to help keep your loved ones safe this winter.Prepare for a winter storm before it hitsEnsure you and your family have enough food and water to last until the storm passes and road conditions improve. Make sure you keep all cell phones and tablets charged in case the power goes out.Flashlights (not candles), blankets and other warm clothing should also be kept handy in case of power failure.Cold weather-related incidents are very common with someone who is having difficulty understanding their environment or reasoning through normal activities of daily living. One wrong misinterpretation on a cold winter night can lead to someone wandering in the cold with disastrous consequences, shares Ms. Suva-Surovi.If you dont live near your loved one, see if someone who lives nearby can check up on them before and after the storm. Inform them of emergency contacts and where important medical information, such as their insurance card, can be found.Prevent hypothermiaHypothermia is a concern for everyone in the winter, but persons living with Alzheimers or related dementia can be at an even greater risk. Some dementia sufferers may find it difficult to detect temperature and weather changes. To help keep your loved ones safe, make sure you know the signs of hypothermia. Look for shivering, exhaustion, sleepiness, slurred speech, memory loss and clumsy motor skills.Remove space heaters and electric blanketsElectric space heaters can pose a fire risk, especially when used with extension cords or if they get knocked over. To keep loved ones with Alzheimers or related dementia safe, remove all space heaters from their home. Or, purchase space heaters that automatically turn off when they reach a set temperature or tip over.An electric blanket could burn the skin of those living with dementia without them even realizing the blanket is too hot. While most people can tell when they start to get too warm from an electric blanket, those with Alzheimers or related dementia may be less sensitive to changes in temperature. To keep your loved ones safe, it is better to remove all electric blankets from their home.Check the heating system and install carbon monoxide detectorsThe risk of carbon monoxide poisoning is increased with the use of the furnace and other heating methods used to keep your house warm. The odorless, tasteless gas can quickly build up to dangerous levels without your knowledge. Carbon monoxide poisoning can cause a dull headache, dizziness, nausea, vomiting, confusion, weakness, blurred vision, shortness of breath and loss of consciousness.Keep loved ones safe by having their heating system checked once a year. Also, install carbon monoxide detectors on each level of their home.Clear ice and snowThere is an increased risk of slips and falls when snow and ice cover the ground. Persons living with Alzheimers or related dementia may also have vision issues that can make it harder to see ice or realize that a walkway is slippery. Keep all stairs, walkways and driveways clear of snow and ice by shoveling often and using rock salt. However, make sure to not overuse the salt as this can cause traction issues.Keep living spaces well-litThe winter blues, or seasonal affective disorder, comes from decreased sunlight and shorter days in the winter months. It can also be confusing for those suffering from Alzheimers and related dementia.Reduced sunlight can disrupt normal sleep patterns and cause increased anxiety. You can help your loved ones by installing timers for their lights to turn on before it starts getting dark. Also, open the blinds during the daylight hours and keep all hallways well lit.Prepare for an emergencyWandering in the winter can be extremely dangerous for your loved one, as they may become lost and not dressed appropriately for the weather. If your loved one with Alzheimers or related dementia does wander off, make sure you have a plan of action.Families who have a loved one with Alzheimers or dementia should have an in case of emergency kit on hand. The kit should include a picture of your loved one, medical documents, their prescription list, copies of legal documents, copies of insurance cards and IDs, a flashlight and first aid supplies, Ms. Suva-Surovi suggests.This information would be helpful to share with police and other authorities who will be helping you search for your loved one. You may also use a permanent marker or sew identification into their clothes with your contact information. You can also look into joining a program that can help you track your loved one with GPS. These often require a monthly subscription fee.Being a caregiver to someone with dementia has so many unknowns that can leave you feeling lost and out of control. Having knowledge of the situation and what could come, along with being prepared, can give you back some control, Ms. Suva-Surovi shares.

There is no question that people with dementia related diseases will eventually develop a problem in regard to dealing with their daily finances. In my fathers case it was the first sign to me that something was very wrong.Throughout the years it had always amazed me how he never needed to use a calculator. He could do complex math equations in his head like a bona fide mathematician. But suddenly I began to notice that he couldnt even balance his checkbook correctly.Complications in money managing are a common early sign of dementia. Trouble counting change, stacks of unopened bills or excessive purchases on credit card statements can tell the tale. Unfortunately, this may not be noticed until there is a large amount of debt already accumulated. This is due to their short-term memory loss.Sadly, there are thousands of deceitful people just waiting for the chance to take advantage of those who are memory impaired. Telemarketers, charity scams, health care scams and even door-to-door solicitors can be absolutely brutal to anyone who becomes easy prey.Things to be on the lookout for are large numbers of packages being delivered, sudden changes in their bank account balances and overdue bill notices.One option may be to re-route their mail to a post office box so you, the caregiver, can have a firsthand look at whats going on. But you may also find, as I did, that there is rarely any time to go and retrieve the mail.Try switching out their credit cards with prepaid ones and only let them carry around small amounts of cash. With my father, I always tried to make sure he had some money in his pocket. This way it kept him feeling as if he still had some kind of independence. Although, he was always trying to pay someone for their services, even if he did not owe them a penny. This included Hospice nurses that came to the house. Well actually, most of the time he would just tell me to pay them.Now, what if you find out that they have already accumulated a $10,000.00 credit card debt? Request a copy of a free credit report with their name on it. This will show you when these accounts were actually opened. If they are newer accounts that have been acquired after the symptoms of dementia have started, these accounts may not be valid. A person must be fully competent and in sound mind when signing a contract. Also check to see if they signed up for credit card insurance. This would be quite helpful in dealing with the pay-off.Have their doctors write a letter stating that they are permanently cognitively impaired and approximately when their symptoms began. If they are residing in an adult care center, have the administration write a letter verifying that they are now under their care.Take some comfort in knowing that Social Security funds cannot be garnished for credit card debt. However, pensions and personal savings are vulnerable.If this all boils down to you having to appear in court on their behalf, youll want the judge to review these documents. And if you havent already consulted with an Elder Law Attorney, I suggest you do so right away. Whatever fees you have to pay the attorney will surely make up for the outcome if you dont have the correct legal advice.This is why its so important to have someone thats trustworthy appointed as Durable Power of Attorney early on.As the Power of Attorney, it is vital to get in that strict habit of placing P.O.A. at the end of your signature every single time you sign something on their behalf. This will protect you. Also, realize your rights as a P.O.A. will cease to exist the very moment they take their final breathe.We must be ever diligent when seeking to protect our loved ones afflicted with this devastating disease. There truly are vultures perched on every corner just waiting for the right moment to swoop in! 

I have 374 photos and videos of my mother stored on my iPhone. These likenesses capture her in the earliest days of her dementia while my father was still alive, through multiple care home moves, and finally the last days before my mothers death, where she napped in the warmth of the sun while seated in a hospice wheelchair.They are a balm for me. I look back with fondness in capturing her in happy times, in sad ones, and in those when she was vulnerable or angry. I've shared the pictures with my kids, siblings, and on social media and blogs. But I wonder, did I ever cross the line in sharing too much? Where did the responsibility lie in respecting her privacy and her wishes, when she was a person who could not say no in her dementia. Who decides when the virtual sharing of posts or images is too much?Are We Oversharing as Caregivers?We live out our lives through social media. The connected world brings us closer together and highlights our isolation. With social media comes conflict and risks. We are all guilty of asking, Let me see the picture before you post it. We fear letting the world see too many of our imperfections. We want the world to see us as we see ourselves. But what happens when someone else makes that decision?When writing both my parents obituaries, there was concern amongst siblings over which photo would accurately portray the person we loved. Does one publish a photo of the best representation of that person or publish one that is present-day? In both instances, we chose photos which offered a glimmer of who that person was before a diagnosis of Parkinson's or Alzheimer's.Caregivers are tasked with overwhelming duties, not the least of which is to protect loved ones when they're unable to speak or act for themselves. This extends to how they are portrayed to the world outside the comfort of their house or care home. We have financial and medical power of attorneys to ensure our loved ones wishes are being met. While POAs cover many legal actions, we do not have social media power of attorneys to keep harmful videos of us off Tik Tok or YouTube. There are precautions for us to assign an executor for digital assets when we die, but who will protect us in the virtual world while were still here? We don't have these protections for the living. For that, we need insightful caregivers.Virtual SupportWhen struggling with their duties, caregivers often turn to digital communities as way of creating bonds. In those forums, plenty of compassion, warmth, and wisdom is shared. But what if a relative or friend of the loved one does not agree with this sharing? What if what you reveal is inappropriate? Who decides?The Institute on Aging offers tips to ensure respect for the boundaries you've agreed to as caregiver. They suggest joining private forums, which don't allow for widespread sharing of content, involvement in caregiving groups in person to eliminate the prospect of wanting to post online, and finally, composing your thoughts or posts on paper in a private journal. Separate yourself from your words or images, evaluate them thoroughly, and decide if its appropriate content or the best use of language before sharing. Despite our best intentions, any post on social media can be twisted around. To be the best advocate for our loved ones, its important we keep not only their medical information safe, but their social information too. My mother used to call these personal revelations, airing out our dirty laundry. The use of social media would be abhorrent to her today.MITA recent MIT review, Dementia content gets billions of views on Tik Tok, examined the use of viral videos which portray the many facets caregiving. One daughter, Jacquelyn Revere, first began her series of videos in concert with her mother when she's fresh out of the shower and her hair is done and she feels like Ooh, I'm that girl. She now prefers to address more difficult aspects off screen. With her mother advancing to a more critical stage of dementia, she's moved to creating more educational content.For the younger generation who has grown up with social media and documented every aspect of their life, its difficult to imagine not sharing everything, and therefore, to not cross an imaginary line. For the older generations, who are unaccustomed to social medias backlash, they make unintentional mistakes and post social media content in ways more harmful than they envisioned.According to dementia expert, Teepa Snow, some of the earliest viral videos she recalled seeing about those living with dementia leaned into those stereotypes (about a combatant mother or an infantilized father) and were created to argue that the person being filmed should not live independently. These harmful videos have migrated over time from the pre-social internet to Facebook, YouTube, and now Tik Tok.Another woman in the MIT review, Kate Swaffer, was diagnosed with younger-onset semantic dementia at age 49. She takes exceptions to videos on Tik Tok that portray those with dementia as helpless or feeding into society's expectations of them, including the language used. There's been a long discussion about language, respectful language on our terms. People without dementia regularly say that we are suffering or, you know, sufferers of dementia, she says. I've been bullied off of social media twice now by carers groups for daring to say, Please don't call us sufferers. We should steer away from reducing their experiences to a social media GIF or soundbite.Though they vary in form and technology, social media platforms are here to stay. We need to remember we are advocates for our loved ones in medicine, finance, the law, and in other real-world scenarios. We must be their advocates in the virtual world too.Submitted By: Arden Courts at Lely Palms, CLICK HERE for more information!Annette Januzzi Wick is a writer, speaker, and author of I'll Have Some of Yours ,a journey of cookies and caregiving(Three Arch Press)and is a recipient of a 2020 NSNC award. A frequent contributor toCincinnati.com, her work has appeared in Grief Becomes You, Before the Diagnosis, Cincinnati Magazine, nextavenue.com, Shanti Arts, 3rd Act Magazine, and others. Visit annettejwick.com to learn more.