CareCorner Respite Care

It is often said, "Caregivers find themselves doing things they never thought they could do," this can include personal care: bathing and showering, dressing and changing their loved one. Not knowing when or how...Being a caregiver to a loved one can take a tremendous toll, on any individual. Self-care or self-love may seem inconceivable. Anything related to self, may seem a distant past. One of the biggest challenges that caregivers face, they stop caring for themselves. Things that can be affected are sleep, exercise, doctor appointments, nutritious food, isolation and/or depression, monetarily (they may have to quit their jobs or have a reduction in hours, adding to their stresses), showering, shopping, pet care, housekeeping and any extracurricular appointments (getting hair done, going to the bank, etc.). The Five Biggest Challenges, Facing CaregiversMonetarily: Often, when an individual takes on the role of caregiver to a loved one, they have to quit their job or reduce the amount of hours they have been working to accommodate this new role, either in their home, or that of the loved one--it is an unpaid and can be a long-term position. Being a caregiver to a loved one creates new and added expenses, accumulated over time. Isolation: The life the caregiver once knew, either working or spending time with family and friends, begins to dissipate. Simply going to the grocery store, or getting their hair done, can create new challenges. This isolation can deplete caregivers' emotional health, often leading to depression.Sleep Deprivation: Many caregivers lack adequate sleep, quantity and quality. They either have their ear to a monitor or they're sleeping in the same room with their loved one, and then getting up, anywhere from every few hours, to several times per night to assist their loved ones with medication, drinks of water, the restroom, or to change them or change the bedding.Planning and Organizing: Being a caregiver to a loved one is centered on that loved one's needs. The caregiver may need to shower or wash and change their loved one several times per day, change the bedding more than once per day, may need to accommodate a special diet, medications, their appointments...all of this can make it difficult to manage a day's time, doing other needed tasks, such as housekeeping, laundry, accounting, shopping, or even simply getting a shower and a few minutes of alone time for the caregiver.Mental and physical exhaustion: Monetary stresses; sleep deprivation; not eating enough, eating too much, or not eating healthily; the day-in and day-out stresses of physically caring for another's physical and mental needs; not having enough hours in the day to get everything done or tend to any personal needs (or wants), ALL of this can, and more than likely will, lead to mental and physical exhaustion for the caregiver. What can a caregiver do to help their loved one and to help themselves? First and foremost, caregivers should ask for help. So often, many individuals are afraid to say, "I need help." Start with a friend, neighbor, co-worker or cousin. Be specific when asking for help: "I need someone to stay with mom, Tuesday at 2:00 pm; I need to attend a doctor appointment;" or "Kathy would you be able to bring a meal [or grocery shop] for me tomorrow? I'm struggling right now."Check with the local senior agency. They may have a program available at low or no cost, bringing in trained caregivers a few hours per week, allowing the caregiver to tend to their own needs and re-charge their batteries.Call on local agencies to bring someone in as frequently as daily (this could be during the day or night) or as little as a few hours per week. For many individuals, the initial cost can seem challenging; however, when weighed out, bringing in a trained caregiver or CNA, can alleviate many or all of the challenges facing a caregiver. For more information on care services for a loved one in Southern Colorado, call CareCorner Colorado Respite Care: 719-691-5206 or visit them on the web: www.carecorner.org. Gina Paradiso Cathcart is the director of CareCorner Colorado Respite Care. She is a health care educator, passionate about service to others and quality patient care. She can be reached at carecornerofcolorado@gmail.com

Some years back, I had a professor who could turn almost any lecture about English into an antagonistic, argumentative upheaval about...God. It was never a do you or dont you believe stance; oh no, in some ways, that would have been too easy. Shut the book. Discussion over. He would begin the days lecture about Shakespeares Hamlet, for example, and end by sharing his personal and critical viewpoints on various religions; ultimately, narrowing his argument down by giving positive attributes to his prospective religion, citing that it was what was community-centered, and therefore, best.Low-and-behold, it was during this course that I found a case study, showing the remarkably, improved results of hospitalized patients, who had fallen ill. It wasnt a surgery that made them better. Or a slurry of medication, per se. It was simply the power of prayer. I marched right up to professor before class had begun, case study in hand, excited to share my findings with him. He, on the other hand, seemed little to not-at-all impressed. He brushed it off with a mere, Uh, huh, slightly acknowledging me. In the end, I was able to tie together the case study and the scene where Hamlet stumbled upon Claudius, making an argument for the power of prayer. If my memory serves me correctly, the class wasnt a religious or Shakespearean class; it was some sort of rhetoricthe ability to speak! I got an A on the paper. Little did I know then how much this topic would impact my future (not the rhetoric, well maybe), but the power of prayer when someone is facing an illness or death is impending. It was during my years, working with patients and families who were facing serious illnesses that I would often reflect, thinking about the case study and wonder: Has everyone read the case study? Every person I work with seems to have a magic heart, who knows when and where to be to help a patient and/or a family member out, offering everything from an ear to bend, a meal, to prayer. Volunteers appear, as if magically, in the middle of the night, to sit with, to pray with, a patient who might not have anyone else. There is a Chinese saying, said Larry Dossey, M.D.: A bird does not sing because it is looking for an answer; it sings because it has a song. Dr. Dossey, has written several books on the positive effects of prayer in hospitals. He is the former chief of staff at Humana Medical City Dallas. His definition of prayer is broad. His studies have shown positive effects for those with whom prayer is given when faced with an illness. This can be especially positive if shared by someone with whom the person loves or is cared by. The study has even shown positive results when the hospitals go as far as to employ people to sit and pray with those individuals who are left to themselves. Interestingly, while most people are only curious about the positive/negative effects impacting humans, the study proved the power of prayer is effective when observing it on plants, bacteria growth in petri dishes and tumor growth in animals.I am constantly reminded of the words of one of my favorite social workers: People need people. Study or no study, my co-workers had long figured this out, and they were simply being people, when people needed people.Gina (Paradiso) Cathcart is the director of Carecorner, Ltd., Colorado Respite Care. She is a healthcare educator, passionate about service to others and quality patient care. She can be reached at carecornerofcolorado@gmail.com.

Rhonda told me, desperately searching for a way to fight off the tears that were filling her endlessly deep, blue, ocean-like, eyes, Todays the one-year anniversary, but I know shes much better now, referring to the death of her mother.Rhonda Pepper was her mother, Vera Ruth Goodrichs caregiver. She was diagnosed with Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD). This is due to progressive nerve cell loss in the brains frontal lobes; it is the area behind the forehead or just behind the eyes.Mrs. Goodrich, who went by Ruth to all who knew her, was a respected, long-time banker in Rocky Ford and La Junta. She had lived in her home with her son Richard after the passing of her husband, Rhondas father, but about six years ago, Rhonda started noticing some behavior changes in her mother. She started getting up in the middle of the night and getting dressed. She would set the table for the entire family. She was doing things out of nature, financially, Rhonda said.This was the first of many cues in a succession, including, to Rhondas dismay, Ruth, who was still driving, got completely lost during a blizzard, ending all the way up in Limon. This was in the early spring of 2009. I didnt think wed find her, said Rhonda, whose husband Tracy, son Dylan and brother Richard made the drive, picking Ruth up from a diner.She was already living with Rhonda and her husband at that point. She moved in with us in January of 2009 but we didnt get the diagnosis of Frontotemporal Dementia until May. Finally, everything we had been experiencing, it pulled it all together, said Rhonda, with a look that can only be described as bittersweet. They finally had the answers to the why? but now what? Caregivers are so often put in this role or a position of a role reversal.Rhonda said in the beginning her mother could stay home alone. Friends came in to take her to do things. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, they would take her to the Senior Center in La Junta and Swink. Rhonda, who is a poised person, said she tried to maintain a level of organization as a caregiver, she kept things structured. Mom would get up and get herself dressed in the morning and then I would leave her lists of little jobs to do while I was at work. She would take care of the dogs for example. Rhonda said the fear of her wondering off was ever-looming.In the fall of 2010 doctors confirmed that an auto accident that Ruth had been involved in during the summer excelled the progression of her FTD, compounding her dementia. Rhonda quit her job to stay at home with her mother full time. She said, with love and compassion, That was my job. Prior to the accident Ruth was able to talk and walk, with assistance, but Rhonda said all of that faded. Even though she didnt speak, I could tell her disposition through her eyes. I could tell if she liked someone or a situation, said Rhonda, her daughter, her caregiver.As a full-time caregiver, Rhonda sought outside help a few hours a week, bringing in respite care. This allowed me some down-time. I could go sit at the park and read a book; go to my own doctor appointments; attend group meetings for caregivers; it just allowed me to remove myself from the environment and recharge my batteries.Until or unless someone is in the position of being a caregiver, people dont realize the effects, physically and emotionally, it has on them. The term respite literally translates to a time of rest.Rhonda shared with me how blessed she felt to be able to quit her job and stay at home with her mother. She made my life better, she said. She also shared the realistic views behind closed doors and what its really like to care for an ailing adult. Its like taking care of an adult infant. Every two hours I would take her to the bathroom; I would shower her; I dressed her; I would change her wet and soiled pants; I would feed her. Rhonda also said she was never fully rested, only sleeping lightly at night because she always had one ear on her mother.As a dutiful and loving caregiver, Rhonda remained loyal to her mothers lifelong regiments and to the things that made her life quality, making sure her hair was properly set, lips were adorned with lipstick each and every day and her favorite food was prepared and fed to her. Rhonda said, I think its important, even for the CareProvider coming in to know the schedule, to know what she likes, what her favorite foods are.Ruth passed away on November 30, 2014. Rhonda said that while she was able to spend time with her mother during her final months, she really misses the conversation that they once shared, which is the sad part of dementia.Gina (Paradiso) Cathcart is the director of CareCorner, Ltd., Colorado Respite Care. She is a healthcare educator, passionate about service to others and quality of life. She can be reached at 719-691-5206

Some years ago, while working, I would meet with my favorite doctor; we would have lunch or a quick cup of coffee. We would discuss trends in healthcare, how we could better serve our patients and their family members. We would talk about travel plans, places we have been or places we were planning on going. He would tell me about restaurants in other cities and states, offering world cuisine, giving his advice on where to go. We would attend healthcare seminars together, the kind that provided education on colon health, telling us not to eat processed meat and foods, limit red meat intake and to eat more fruit and vegetables.He would suggest books and send me articles to read. I gained knowledge and understanding from this doctor; I learned about people, places, and more than *just* health, I learned about service to others, living and dying.In 2014, he sent me an article: How to Stay Healthy Even if You Eat Junk, Smoke Ciggies, Skip Exercise & Booze It Up, (wakeup-world.com) written by a doctor (Lissa Rankin, MD, author of the book Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself). She begins by saying, for years doctors have encouraged people to kick the habit (ya know, the tobacco one), eat a more plant-based diet, drink less alcohol and exercise more. The article goes on to talk about a tribe of Italians: they didnt go a day without eating meatballs, that dripped with lard; they smoked, because they wanted; alcohol? If theyre going to eat red meat and fat in excess, as well as smoke, assuredly, they werent going to go a day without drinking and eating pasta and breads, too.Yet, they had an extremely low incidence of heart disease and other illnesses. Most died of old age. What was it, in spite of their unhealthy lifestyle that contributed to their longevity? People. They were a tribe connected to one another within their community. Many had multi-generations, living within one roof. They shared their dinners and delights; they were a daily show of togetherness, with their families. They gave and had a constant feeling of love and support. Loneliness, on the other hand is the number one contributor to an actual unhealthy lifestyle, according to the article. This feeling raises cortisol levels (an increase is what fuels the fight or flight system). Balanced cortisol levels help to manage and better use the intake of carbs, fats and proteins; control inflammation; sleep better; regulate blood pressure and blood sugar; and maintain energy.Poor emotional health is likely to show up as a weakened immune system in the body, causing colds, infections and other aches and pains. It can also show up as stress, anxiety, anger and depression. It can also cause the loss of interest in eating healthy, exercising and taking medication, as well as abusing alcohol and/or drugs.It all comes down to quality of life, having a partner that brings you fulfillment and satisfaction; family and friends; a job you dont dread going to each day. For some it might be a stringent, weekly, exercise program; for others it might be a book club, traveling or some combination therein. On the other hand, having a partner who is always angry or who you walk on eggshells around, can create short- and long-term health problems, including anxiety, high blood pressure, headaches, and other health issues, leading to a shortened lifespan. The five areas who have the longest living people in the world are: Sardinia, Italy; Okinawa, Japan; Nicoya, Costa Rica; Loma Linda, Calif; and Ikaria, Greece. Most of the people in these areas live to be 90 and well beyond (Sardinia has the most male centenarians in the world).While Im not saying Im going to be giving up my beloved cheeseburgers or my glorious meatballs (which might be cooked in, yes, lard...also olive oil and love) anytime soon, the people of these areas do boast a mostly plant-based diet, with some variations from one location to the next. The one thing they all have in common: familial closeness, a tight-knit social circle, community.Growing up, Sunday was always my favorite day of the week. Grandma and Grandpas table seemed to extend endlessly. The intense, flavorful smell of the sugu and meatballs must have wafted a block in each direction.Today, because of the love and support we were shown and taught growing up, siblings, cousins and aunts and uncles remain steadfast in our support to one another within our family. Even though we dont have sugu every Sunday, we continue the tradition of Sunday dinners.As one of my favorite social workers always says: People need people! Gina (Paradiso) Cathcart is the director of Carecorner, Ltd., Colorado Respite Care. She is a healthcare educator, passionate about service to others and quality patient care. She can be reached at carecornerofcolorado@gmail.com.