Keystone Place at Bonita Springs

The decision to transition into a Senior Living Community is a major one, but it is only the first step. Next comes what many families experience as a much more daunting process sifting through the options to find the right community for their loved ones. After all, with increasing life expectancy, todays seniors may call this community home for a decade, possibly much longer. These years are no longer a time of inevitable decline but can and often do represent a new phase of a bright and vibrant life. This also means making the right choice is even more important, with many vital years ahead, it had never been more important to make the right choice the first time, minimizing traumatic disruptions, which can be especially detrimental with age or with memory-related concerns like Alzheimers or other forms of dementia. Although the transition from living on ones own into a Senior Living community is not without challenges, choosing a community that feels like home is paramount to creating the energy of hope and possibility. The confidence of knowing that the community is a safe and secure place, has the ability to provide the highest level of care and offers a multitude of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual enrichment activities, will allow everyone to embrace this new phase with excitement instead of trepidation. Visiting websites and reading marketing material is a good first start, but nothing can compete with visiting the communities you are considering, experiencing an extended tour, and interacting with staff and fellow residents. Imagine the process of choosing the right college for yourself or your graduating teenager - just as all colleges are not created equal or a correct fit for every student, there are many variations in senior living communities that can determine the correct fit. It is important to ask the right questions so that solid decisions can be made right from the start. Read on for our top tips for before your tour, as well as x questions to ask during your tour.Tips for before your tour:Agree on the most important factorsWhat factors matter the most to you and your loved ones. Location? Amenities? Cost? Care levels? What are your must-haves and deal breakers? Deciding which factors matter most will help make the process of filtering through your options much easier.Do your researchDecide on the best person in the family to handle the research and sift through the options. Have them do research via the website, request marketing materials and speak with a Senior Living counselor at the community, as many times as you need, to answer any initial questions.  Narrow your options down to your top choicesUse the research above to narrow the options down to the top choices of Senior Communities that provide the best fit for your selected criteria. Brainstorm your questions in advanceSit down with all involved parties and brainstorm your questions in advance to ensure that by the end of your tour youve collected all the information you need to make an educated decision. Appoint a spokesperson & decide who is goingAlthough everyone may wish they could attend, it may be best to limit the family members available on the tour. It can be helpful to appoint one spokesperson who will do the talking and make sure all questions are answered.  Additionally, if you are looking for a place for your loved one, it sometimes is better to attend the tours without them so that you can narrow your search to your top choice and avoid them feeling overwhelmed.Remember, dont be afraid to ask questions. This is one of the most important decisions of your life. A good community will welcome each and every one of your questions and go above and beyond to not only listen to your desires and concerns but to provide answers that more than satisfy each inquiry. It is vitally important to understand your needs and desires and communicate them thoroughly in order to choose the right location. Most importantly, trust your gut. Can you see you or your loved one living happily there?  If a community looks great on paper but doesn't feel like the right fit for you and your loved one, its probably not the right fit.  Don't compromise, the right community is out there! 

When asked about their biggest fears, more than half of todays seniors frequently mention worries about affording senior living options or being a burden on their family near the top of the list. It makes sense. Coming to terms with the need or desire to transition into a Retirement Community, whether for Independent Living, Assisted Living or Memory Care - no matter how ultimately positive - can feel challenging, emotionally intense and come with the anticipation of great expense. This is especially true if you anticipate the need for assisted living or memory care. It can be easy for this process to feel so overwhelming that we avoid it until its an absolute necessity. However, with seven out of ten Americans over the age of 65 requiring some type of care during their lives, planning ahead can alleviate a tremendous amount of stress. The Good News:Although it may seem surprising, the cost of living at a Senior Living community is often comparable (or even lower) even without taking into account the included activities, amenities, and services, with the combined expenses of living in a single-family home.While the investment may at first seem daunting, it is also important to consider the long term costs of maintaining your own residence throughout your senior years. For example, a proactive decision to choose an Assisted Living community can actually be much less expensive than an extended stay in a nursing care center or receiving care at home.Rest assured, there are countless financial options that can help ease the financial transition to a senior living community. Todays seniors and their families frequently contact us looking for advice on how to afford the cost of senior living without compromising their quality of care. At Keystone, we aim to support all prospective residents and their families in determining the best path forward to solidifying the financial aspects of securing the perfect location and community. Many of our residents have utilized the following five types of financial alternatives to help cover the costs of our incredible community.Long Term Care InsuranceVeterans BenefitsOwn Home or Assets Existing Life InsuranceCaregiver Tax Credit1. Long-Term Care InsuranceAlthough the pricing of living in a Senior Living Community can be surprisingly comparable to maintaining a separate home, many families still find themselves with a gap. Private insurance, Medicare or Medicaid may help, but typically will not cover everything nor is it accepted at many Senior Living Communities. Long Term Care (LTC) Insurance can help bridge that gap but can vary widely from policy to policy. Premiums are normally based on age at the time of purchase, benefit amount, and deductible. Wading through insurance coverage can be confusing, but a clear understanding of the benefits of your policy is vital to make sure you are able to maximize the coverage you are paying for. For instance, your LTC insurance company may cover only licensed or approved facilities, or require proof that you or your loved one requires assistance with at least two ADLs (Activities of Daily Living) such as bathing, eating or transferring from bed to chair.  Often all that is needed a a quick call to your insurance provider to gain clarity on your benefits. 2. Veterans BenefitsDid you/your loved one or a spouse serve in the armed forces? If so, you may want to explore eligibility for benefits through the Department of Veterans Affairs. Less than 10% of qualified individuals apply for Veterans Aid and Attendance, which can be used to cover the monthly costs of your senior housing and care, especially if you experienced service-related injuries or disabilities or can demonstrate medical and financial need.  Its important to note that VA benefits can take 6-9 months to process, and will require military discharge papers and medical documentation; advance planning is important.  3. Your Own HomeIf you or your loved one is a homeowner, the house can be sold to cover the costs of living in a Senior Retirement Community. If the time is not right to sell the home, converting it into a long or short term rental can be a great interim step to cover senior living costs. You may also consider a reverse mortgage if you wish to keep the home in the family. This allows a borrower to draw cash against the equity built up in your home in either a larger lump sum or over a period of time. The best place to start with exploring either of these options is by contacting a local Real Estate professional that specializes in your market AND with assisting Seniors.4. Existing Life InsuranceDo you or your loved one have an existing life insurance policy that is no longer needed or wanted? More than 70% of Life Insurance taken out, never pays a claim because people's needs change and they cancel or change their coverage.  There are several ways this insurance may be used to ease the cost of living in a Senior Living Community. In the advent you or your loved one is in need of Assisted Living Benefits, it is possible the policy has what is commonly referred to as a Living Benefits Rider.   This rider allows the policy owner/insured to receive benefit from the policy now and the remainder would go to beneficiaries.   In some cases it is possible to sell this policy to an institutional investor - third party for an amount that is greater than the cash surrender value, but less than the total death benefit (usually 15- 40% of the total). This transaction is called a Life Settlement.  The process typically takes 3 - 6 months and it is important to utilize a licensed Life Settlement Broker and/or the support of your Financial Advisor.  The proceeds from the sale of your policy can then be used toward the costs of your retirement living or anything you desire.    If you want to keep your policy in place, it may be possible to adjust the payout amount for your beneficiaries, and borrow against the existing cash value. Not all policies allow for this option, so it is necessary to contact your insurance provider or financial advisor. You may also be eligible to convert your existing life insurance to a long-term care plan, however, this can significantly reduce your policy value as for death benefit and not all life insurance policies have this conversion feature.Note: cashing out your life insurance policy and/or participating in a Life Settlement can have income tax implications.  Please consult with a tax and financial professional prior to considering these options. 5. Caregiver Tax CreditsIf you or your loved one requires assistance with ADLs (Activities of Daily Living) such as eating, dressing or toileting or requires supervision for health and safety due to cognitive impairment (the type of services provided by Assisted Living or Memory Care), you may be eligible to deduct partial or full long term expenses associated with their care as an unreimbursed medical expense. In order to qualify for this deduction, the resident must have been certified as chronically ill by a licensed health care provider.   It is also advised you contact your tax profesional to learn more about this Tax Credit. Dont put all your eggs in one basketThe five avenues detailed above are just a handful of the options available for helping ease the financial expenses of senior living. Beyond private payments and personal loans, these five options represent a solid starting point for your research - but in no way represent a comprehensive list. Be creative and think outside of the box.Choose the correct level of care  In most cases, the funding for Retirement, including Independent Living, Assisted Living & Memory Care comes from more than one source. However, no matter the source, it is vitally important to use that funding wisely by choosing the correct level of care. Choosing the right type of care is an important step in minimizing the costs associated with senior living. For instance, someone needing minimal assistance may still be suited for Independent Living with family or outside providers taking on any additional duties, an option far less expensive than Assisted Living.Check out our FAQ to compare each type of care and to learn the right level for you or your loved one.Bottom Line: The most powerful thing you can do to minimize the financial adjustment to Retirement living in a Senior Living Community is to plan ahead One of the most important ways to navigate the many transitions of senior living is to prepare ahead of time before the need or desire arises. You or your loved one may not be quite ready for the move right now, which makes this the perfect time to begin doing your research and learn about options and how to get the financial end in line, long before it is needed. Waiting till the last minute can intensify the stress of the transition, financially and otherwise, and could mean you end up in a location that isnt a good fit, increasing the chances of needing to move again - with all of the financial implications.  Even with options, the logistics can be overwhelming. Scheduling a tour and consultation at each senior living community you are considering to fully explore the financial options and assistance available at each community.  At Keystone, our Senior Living Counselors are expertly trained in helping you navigate all aspects of Senior Living, including financial.

You may be surprised to find that when you add up all of your current costs of living, you can move to a Keystone Community, worry less and live more all for a comparable amount to what you are spending now if not less.It is the #1 common misconception that living in an Independent Living, Assisted Living or Memory Care community is unattainable because of finances. At Keystone, our Senior Living Counselors are trained to not only listen to your needs and help guide you, but to help you find a solution that is best for you and/or your loved one. This includes financially.It is important to have a strong understanding of your financial house prior to making the decision to move into a Senior Living Community. We encourage you to click on and download our Value Worksheet (as seen below) to calculate and compare your monthly costs to Keystone Living. 

Deciding to move into a Senior Living Community or even simply considering this transition can often feel daunting.  It doesnt have to though if you take a few moments to be prepared.   We have found that our residents and family members that asked us the most questions, had the easiest transitions.  Our advice to you is: Dont be afraid to ask questions. This is one of the most important decisions of your life whether for you or your loved one. A good community will welcome each and every one of your questions and go above and beyond to provide answers to satisfy each inquiry. It is vitally important to understand your needs and desires and then communicate them thoroughly in order to choose the right location and/or make this decision. Below is a list of more than 100 questions you can use to help guide you during this process:Accommodations:How much privacy do residents have?What are the floor plans and measurements of available rooms or apartments?What personal items or furniture are we allowed to bring? Are any items forbidden?Are pets allowed? If so, are there size or breed restrictions?What is the activity/traffic and noise level that can be expected? Are there any restrictions or limitations on guests?Amenities and Location:What are the grounds like?Are there physical fitness facilities?Is there a pool and/or hot tub?Is laundry included?What makes you different than other communities?What outdoor amenities and spaces do you offer?Do you offer concierge services?Is the community located in a desirable area with conveniences nearby (grocery stores, pharmacy, public transit, hospitals, etc.)?Do residents have access to computers and printers?Activities:What activities do you offer?Can we see a typical calendar of events?Do you offer events out in the wider community as well as within the community?Is there an opportunity for volunteer or service work?Is there an opportunity for my loved one to teach other residents a favorite skill?Do residents have to meet any requirements to participate in activities or are there conditions that disqualify participation?Can we sit in on or view some of the activities during our tour?Can residents organize or suggest new activities?Transportation:Do you offer community-based transportation to medical appointments?Do you offer transportation to community events and activities, such as restaurants and theaters? Is there a radius or defined route for available transportation? Is transportation always available or only on specific days?Are there any additional fees associated with transportation?How far in advance does transportation need to be scheduled?Can I bring my own car?Do you offer valet services?What are the parking options if I bring my own car?Safety Concerns:How do you ensure the safety of residents?How do residents access the buildings?How do visitors access the building?Do residents have access to alert buttons for emergency service?Do these buttons pinpoint location?Do the rooms/apartments have safety features like handrails, easy entry bathtubs, grip bars, or non-slip surfaces?How do you ensure residents are present and accounted for?Do you have an emergency response plan in place?Do you conduct periodic safety drills (i.e, fire drills) to acclimate residents to procedures? How do you handle power outages? Is there a generator?Can we request safety checks?Issues and complaints:How does the community handle concerns and feedback?Do you have a specific staff member or advisory board that handles issues and complaints?What is the procedure or timeline for follow up on a complaint?How do you ensure timely communication on reported issues? How should issues or complaints be submitted?Does the community have a resident counsel that assists with issues and/or complaints?References, testimonials, and reviews:Do you have any case studies, testimonials or reviews from staff and residents that we can access?Can we speak to the family members of some current or former residents who can provide references?Can we speak with current residents or staff during our tour privately?Staff:What background checks are performed on your staff?What is your staff-to-resident ratio?What kind of / how much experience, training or credentials do you require?Do you require your staff to obtain continuing education?What sort of staff meetings and communication exists to keep staff up to date on important developments?How many staff are present overnight?Who will interact with and care for my loved one on a daily basis?Food:Do you offer all-day dining, or only during specific hours?What sort of menu options are available?Do you offer options for meals based on personal preference?How do you ensure residents are receiving proper nutrition?Do you offer special dietary options for those with medical needs or restrictions?Do you have a dietitian or nutritionist on staff? Is room service available?Can we try a sample of the typical menu on our tour? How often are menus change or new food items added?Medical Services:Is there a written care plan?How often are care plans reviewed?How do you handle emergency medical needs?Do you do health or cognitive assessment prior to move in? What medical care is available on site? Does on-site medical care differ from day to night?What sort of therapy options do you offer?Can we have outside professionals come to the community to provide care or therapy?Does the community have a physician that visits on site for resident wellness checks and/or visits residents in their apartments?What medical or cognitive conditions can this community manage?Are their conditions you cannot manage that may require us switching communities in the future? What activities of daily living can you help with?Can you assist with medication management and administration? How do you monitor the ongoing medical conditions of residents? Can residents keep prescription or over-the-counter medications in their room, or must they be administered by staff?What medical professionals are on staff? Physician? Nurse? Social Worker? Therapists?What sort of medical and cognitive conditions do current residents have?Can I continue to use the doctors or providers we currently have relationships with? What if we temporarily need a higher level of care than normal?Do you provide palliative, end-of-life or hospice care options?  If there is a prolonged medical emergency or illness that requires leaving the facility, how long can the room be held?Finances and Move-in:Is there a waitlist?Do you offer any assistance with move-in?What is the base price of applicable room options each month or year?How much care is included in the base price and how much are additional care options and charges?What amenities and activities are included in this fee?What utilities are included in this fee (wifi, electric, etc)? How are fees paid?Do you send payment reminders?How long are current costs guaranteed?Do you have any set annual increases?Are all amenities included, or do some involve an additional fee?What happens if fees are delinquent?What is the difference in fees if we need to move to a different level of care?What happens if we are unable to pay? How much of a grace period is available?Can I view a copy of the contract?Are there any upfront move-in fees or security deposits?What is the length of the lease or resident agreement?What if we need to move out before this agreement is complete?Are any feels refundable if you decide the community is not a fit?Communication and transitions:How do you communicate with families?Do you have a community calendar we can access?Do you have a Facebook page, message board or another way for families to connect and stay up to date? Do you send regular email correspondence with up to date news?How do you help new residents have a positive transition into the community?Do you provide a welcoming committee or a way for new residents to connect with other residents?Is there a new resident/family orientation?Can we meet with all of our loved ones care providers before the move in? On a regular basis after move in?Can we be involved in the creation of the care plan?Once you do your research, ask the right questions and go for a tour, you will have the piece of mind of knowing you making an educated and well thought out decision.   You will also be able to trust your gut. You will know and feel it if you can see your loved ones living happily there.  If a community looks great on paper but doesn't feel like the right fit for you and your loved ones, its probably not the right fit.  We take tremendous pride in our caring Senior Living Counselors and the support they provide future residents, their family members and the greater community in navigating this journey.

How loneliness is bad for your health and what it may be costing you and your loved ones.Did You Know:Loneliness can increase the risk of dementia by up to 40%.Social isolation increases risk of death as much as smoking 15 cigarettes per day.Lack of socialization reduces life expectancy more than either physical inactivity or obesity.Its true. And these are far from the only alarming side effects. Multiple studies confirm that seniors who feel lonely or isolated are at risk of a series of physical, emotional and spiritual implications that can impact well being and longevity. Weve all experienced the debilitating impact of loneliness at one time or another, but were only just beginning to understand just how far-reaching the impact of loneliness can be. Chronic loneliness and lack of social stimulation can result in changes to the cardiovascular, immune and nervous systems, increase in stress hormones like cortisol and epinephrine resulting in shorter life spans (up to 26%), increased inflammation, fatigue, and a greater chance of infection, heart disease, and infections. These issues are even more profound for at-risk populations, like seniors.For todays seniors, this dangerous lack of socialization is far from uncommon. The recent National Poll on Healthy Aging, conducted by the University of Michigan Institute for Healthcare Policy and Innovation confirmed the negative impact experienced by seniors who live alone or with family outside of a community of their peers, including:More than 40% of seniors regularly report feeling lonely60 percent reported feeling a lack of companionship41 percent felt isolated by their life circumstancesThis may sound daunting, but there is good news - according to A University of California San Diego study in the American Journal of Geriatric Psychiatry -  seniors with adequate social support and involvement report improved physical health, cognitive function, and life satisfaction. The challenges of social interaction for seniorsFor the average senior living alone or with family, continuous social interaction can be challenging, and the demands on caregivers mean they may struggle to provide sufficient social opportunities.Common struggles include:physical ailmentsgrief over the loss of a spouse or loved onesmobility or logistical problemstransportation issuescognitive declinelack of assistance to take advantage of opportunitiesThere is one key choice that can mitigate almost all of the common challenges the choice to reside in a Senior Living Community.In fact, in a recent year-long study, it was discovered that after moving into a Senior Living Community, 69% of residents reported improved overall social wellness. Those benefits were not simply limited to how residents rated their social interactions, the study showed conclusively that community residents fared better on measures of emotional, social, physical, intellectual and vocational wellness and documented more observably healthy behaviors than their peers who live outside of a senior living community.Its not just about bingo. So, why does the built-in socialization of a Senior Living community provides so many benefits?Simply put, healthy socialization is exercise for the brain, and the results are far-reaching, impacting seniors mentally, physically and emotionally!When involved in regular, planned social activities, seniors continue to utilize many cognitive skills that may decrease or diminish without such opportunities and avoid many of the difficulties that often arise through isolation.10 traits of the socially active senior living residentReduced Stress:Seniors who remain socially active have a better ability to handle stress, which in turn impacts cardiovascular health and a stronger immune system. Longer Lifespan:The studies are clear, seniors who stay active with groups of their peers live longer. Improved Fitness:Residents in a Senior Living community are more likely to exercise more regularly, and we all know that exercise comes with a host of benefits from physical to mental (and everything in between). Reduced Depression:Built-in opportunities for regular social interaction reduces the chances that residents will fall prey to depression or anxiety caused by isolation and loneliness. Improved Self Esteem:Social interaction, including opportunities for volunteer work or community involvement, aids residents in maintaining their sense of self-esteem and self-worthImproved Cognition:Consistent interaction keeps residents stimulated, mentally sharp and engaged intellectually, preventing decline such as memory loss, Alzheimer's and other forms of dementia. Improved Purpose and Belonging:Making new friends and improving bonds happens naturally when seniors are taking part in activities they love with others in their age group who have the same interests. Knowledge of Current Events:Actively engaged seniors retain an increased knowledge of current events compared with their non-social peers. This helps them remain connected to the world at large. Increased Confidence:Regular opportunities for social interaction, particularly when they involve giving back to the community, volunteering, teaching or highlight a residents vocational or natural gifts and skills can provide increased motivation and help seniors to continue to feel helpful and needed. Increase in the Good Hormones:Increases in the bodies natural feel-good hormones, like endorphins, dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin, all stimulated through social activities, can help the body fight off stress and illness.So what does Senior Living have to do with it?Although the overall equation may seem complex, senior living communities play a clear role in improving the lives of todays seniors through social interaction. The activities and programs provided at Senior Living Communities are carefully designed to meet the complex balance of physical, emotional, intellectual, spiritual, social and vocational needs of their residents, taking the pressure off of seniors and their caregivers to research, create, transport and otherwise facilitate these interactions.Social opportunities include:Pet TherapyFitness ActivitiesCard Games and Game NightsArts and CraftsTriviaBook ClubsCommunity Volunteer OpportunitiesPainting ClassesMusic or SingingCommunity Field Trips to Museums, Lectures, Dining, Theatre, etc.Religious services or Bible StudyWhat to watch forIf you are a senior or senior caregiver, it is important to be on the lookout for signs of loneliness or social isolation. Some signs/risk factors include:Lack of a local network of friendsNo close family unitDeath of a spouseChanges or life transitionsChronic illnessDepressionFailing memoryHearing lossFears of falling or drivingIf you are concerned about yourself or your loved one, its important to take action. Consult a healthcare provider, research opportunities for socialization in your community, and ask yourself if it may be time to consider a move to a Senior Living Facility. Scheduling a consult and tour is the first (entirely risk-free) step and can help you get a better sense of just how much Senior LIving could improve your life or the lives of the beloved senior in your life. Reach out now to schedule a tour at your local community.

Key tools and tips on how to talk to your aging parents about money AND feel good.Did you know that fifty-four percent of adults admit that they would rather have the mortifying birds and the bees talk with their kids than bring up money topics with their aging parents?Its likely been true that since you were a kid, there were some topics that you werent so keen to talk about with your parents. Beyond the keen discomfort of talking about sex, the topic that most challenges parents and kids at any age is money.Remember how you responded as a teen when your mom wanted you to account for what happened to your allowance or babysitting money? As parents age, though many of the roles reverse, conversations about money often feel just as awkward as they did back then.In fact, it can even feel more uncomfortable now, especially for parents who were brought up in a generation that was raised to not talk about finances with their children.However, once your parents reach the age where their health, safety, memory loss or ability to care for themselves is in question having the money talk is essential. Never fear, the tips outlined below can help you get over the awkwardness and create an open and loving dialogue with your parents.Begin before its necessaryYou may be thinking that youre a long way off from needing to have this conversation, but this is exactly the time to begin. Starting the conversation before its necessary will allow you to tread gently and take your time understanding their finances, and to determine with them what involvement youll need to take over time. Decide on your goalsIt is important to begin knowing what you desire to get out of the initial conversation and what decisions are necessary overall. What outcome will help relieve your stress and help you breathe easier knowing that your parents finances are in good hands? Identifying these goals in advance can help create a structure and timeline for the conversations ahead. Have the right people involvedUnless you are an only child or unpartnered, there are others who may need or want to be a part of this conversation. Keep in mind though that having too many participants may make things feel intimidating or embarrassing for your parents. You know them best. Its important to make an unbiased decision to include only the individuals who have the closest and most open relationship with them and who have the communication skills to handle the delicate topic with ease.No matter who is a part of the initial conversation, it is important to make sure all involved parties maintain an open flow of information.  To avoid misunderstandings, it is vital to ensure your parents are aware of who will be kept in the loop.  This is so they don't feel that private information is shared with anyone without permission. Ease Your Way in In the time leading up to the larger conversation, begin introducing the topic of money into other, non-threatening conversations. Tell stories of friends, suggest books or programs, or ask open-ended questions that may get your parents thinking more on the topic. For instance, you could ask how their friends and peers are handling their finances during their senior years.Its important to choose a time when your parents are not stressed, rushed or distracted. If at all possible, pick a time when they are in good health. The fact is, eighty-five percent of long-term care decisions are made during a medical crisis, which is a far from an ideal time to be pushed to make major decisions or have uncomfortable conversations. Avoid holidays, birthdays or times of travel or transition. Anything that adds to the stress or confusion will make the conversation harder to have. Tell them in advance there is something you would like to talk to them about and ask is X a good time?   As with all of us, being taken by surprise does not leave a lot of room for good communication. Keep it light and full of loveWhen the time comes for a more formal discussion, the last thing you want to do is to come in full steam ahead. Avoid beginning by asking pointed questions of your parents about their assets, savings, or financial plans for the future, which may put them on the defensive or cause them to shut down.Instead, start with a story or anecdote - for instance, about a friend whose parents passed away unexpectedly leaving no financial direction or share details about your own choices around financial or estate planning with your children.  Sharing details of your own finances can help open doors to help your parents feel more comfortable doing the same. Continue by opening the door for your parents to share if they have made any arrangements or wishes for retirement, housing, or estate planning. Grounding everything in your care and concern for your parents will help guide the conversation on a positive note, acknowledge their potential discomfort and remind them that your questions are rooted in love and concern for their well being. Here, your own knowledge of your parents personalities will come in handy, think of how they typically handle difficult or uncomfortable conversations and what is most helpful to help them relax and open.  Keep your desires reasonable and get rid of any expectationsIt is unlikely that your parents will go from keeping their finances completely private to willingly sharing all of the details in a single conversation.  For instance, instead of expecting that your parents will immediately give you full access and involvement in all financial matters, perhaps begin by requesting to be a part of the monthly bill-paying process so that you can become aware of what obligations are in place. In any case, if you feel their resistance, be patient and give them time to process your requests. Expect some pushbackIts not unusual, especially in the case of parents who are already experiencing some dementia or memory issues, to respond with resistance or suspicion to your attempts to obtain financial information. They may not fully understand why you would need what they have always treated as private information, or may not fully recognize their compromised ability to handle their finances without help. Pride and confusion can play a role in this reaction, and its important to be prepared.Remember, this is not about you, its about them. Leave the control in their hands where possibleOne of the challenging parts about aging is dealing with the loss of control. Even if parents realize they need more support, it can be difficult to face. Reassure them that you are not attempting to take over, simply offering your help. Whenever possible, leave the control over what and when to address in their hands, demonstrating your support and assistance while honoring their need for autonomy. Positioning your support as helping them with a difficult or time-consuming task (like tax preparation) to leave them more time for things they enjoy, like spending time with grandchildren, can help ease the transition. Get it in writing The National Institute on Aging recommends that adult children who may be in a caregiving role obtain advance written consent that allows financial affairs to be discussed with doctors, financial representatives and government officials. Without this type of documentation, privacy laws may prevent barriers to essential conversations.Key areas of information youll need: Location and access to important documents, including health and life insurance, mortgage, birth certificates, deeds, trusts and wills.A list of all contacts, account numbers, passwords (a great free tool for passwords is https://www.lastpass.com/).Monthly bills and creditors, amounts and how they are paid (online or by check, etc. )Wishes around moving into a Senior Living community when desired or necessary and any financial plans in place for this transition. Current financial arrangements for future senior care needs. Simply, simplify, simplifyAs is often the case with seniors, they may not be handling their financial affairs in the easiest and most efficient ways. For instance, many seniors still reply on paying bills in person or by check when online or automated payments or deposits would make things easier and much more sense. They may also be paying for services they do not need or use out of habit. A household budget view can help identify places that money can be saved or redistributed.  Keep things separateOnce you begin taking on some of the tasks of financial management for your parents, it may feel easier to begin paying bills and handling obligations from your own accounts. However, this can be a slippery and confusing slope as your parents continue to age, and it is always wise to keep your personal funds and assets separate from your parents. Know when you need helpIf your parents will not open up or are confused or unaware (as if often the case when a spouse who handled financial agreements has passed), you may need to call in a financial advisor with a specialty in senior living.  Know when its time for immediate interventionIts always best to take a gradual and gentle approach, but sometimes changes happen quickly and unexpectedly. How do you know when its time to step in without delay? Unopened mail or creditor callsIf your parents are normally conscientious and you suddenly notice they have stopped opening mail or answering calls it may be a sign they are no longer able to handle their monthly finances. Unusual or unexpected purchasesAre your parents suddenly making unusual or unnecessary purchases locally, online or from telemarketers who call? Seniors are often vulnerable to scams, so these behaviors are especially concerning.   Sudden concern about finances or purchasesOn the flip side, if your parents suddenly appear excessively concerned about money, unusually frugal or avoiding regular purchases, there also may be issues that need your attention.  Physical changes, illnesses or injuryAny physical changes that make normal activities challenging can impact your parents ability to handle their finances without help. Vision issues, problems impacting the ability to drive, or arthritis and/or chronic pain can all have a detrimental effect and require your assistance.  Changes to memory or cognitionAny evidence of memory failure or dementia is an immediate cause for concern and an indicator of the need to step in financially. At Keystone, we understand that stepping into a new role in your parents finances can be a challenging transition, especially if one of the primary goals is to ensure that financial plans are in place for a Senior Living Community or care at some point in the future. Do you need help establishing access to the financial aspects needed to cover the expenses of Retirement Living regardless if it Independent Living, Assisted Living or Memory Care?  Check out our other financial blog posts, or contact one of our helpful Senior Living Counselors for personalized help.